Gratitude without Attitude

Kolleen Lucariello's creative thinking is amazing, and when it overlaps with biblical truth, her creativity is a positive, motivating force. Such is this Gratitude UPGRADE.

"Relationships are like tractor-trailers," Kolleen says.

I (Dawn) think that's such an intriguing thought! Whatever could Kolleen mean by that? I think you'll be surprised. (This is so good!)

Kolleen continues . . .

The words breezed through my mind and touched down in my heart as I stared mindlessly at the back-end of the tractor-trailer. 

This had been going on for what felt like a gazillion miles as my husband and I shared Interstate 40 with the truckers while in the midst of a cross-country adventure. 

“Odd thought,” I mused.

But the thought wouldn’t leave me. As I reflected on it, a comparison began to form.

You see, I’d lost appreciation for tractor-trailer drivers after losing a friend in an accident years ago. Now, fear caused an accumulation of attitude toward the big trucks.

It’s rather amazing how one experience taints—causing overgeneralization—don’t you think?

But now, after thousands of miles, I grew to have a new appreciation for those driving professionally. They spend so much time on the road driving from one destination to another, entrusted with cargo to be delivered to a distribution center.

• The cargo they carry has worth.
• It has a purpose.
• It has the potential to fulfill desires and meet needs.

Once the cargo arrives at the distribution center, it is placed in a new truck to be delivered to the destination it was intended.

So how are relationships like tractor-trailers?

In the same way the driver has a responsibility to deliver the cargo entrusted to them to the distribution center—fully intact and unharmed—perhaps we’ve been given a similar responsibility for one another by God.

We are, after all, all precious cargo to Him. 

Unfortunately, I find my eyesight fails me from that perspective when, similar to my view of tractor-trailers, a wounded heart clouds my perception, creating little gratitude FOR one another, but oh-so-much attitude WITH one another.

Can you relate? 

Hurt is very persuasive. Left unchecked, hurt upon hurt builds greater attitudes and less gratitude for those around us.

When we allow our attitudes to sour towards others it becomes less appealing to travel beside one another.  

Would that change if we had a different perspective of God’s purpose for relationship?

Could relationship upgrades be possible if we:

• Acknowledged every person, as God’s creation, has worth (Genesis 1:27).
• Accepted God’s call to motivate one another to fulfill their intended purpose (Hebrews 10:24).
• Relished in the opportunity God has given us to meet a need for such a time as this (Esther 4:14).

I often fail to see people the way God does. Sometimes, rather than allow God to choose the cargo of His choice for my life, I’ve predetermined differences are too great, personalities will collide, or we lack commonality.

But, Phillip Barry wrote, “The time to make your mind up about people, is never.”

When we make up our mind about people, taking on attitudes rather than gratitude, we risk devaluing them. 

I can become a bit attitude-ish when I forget that God gives purpose to everyone.

He instructs me to use my words to build others up, according to their needs (Ephesians 4:29, emphasis mine). Their needs, not mine.

If I am always focused on me, how can I build others up to fulfill the purpose God has for them?  

Similar to a tractor trailer, I can’t carry people to the destination I’ve determined is best for them; nor can I give up halfway through the trip.

It sure can be tempting to disregard and dismiss someone due to the conflicts and differences of opinions when they arise. And, while relationships ebb and flow, we’ve become pretty quick at canceling deliveries.

But, have we taken the time to ask God what His plan was for our journey together? 

I’ve never been grateful for the injuries incurred through broken relationships. In fact, I gain more attitude than gratitude when a relationship sours and ends abruptly.

I know how tempting it can be to find an early exit off the ramp. “Just drop me here!” we beg when challenged by differences.

Yet, I wonder if—rather than me determining the distance I’m willing to go with someone who challenges my character—that is a decision God has already determined.

Did we make it to the distribution center He intended for us to go?

Or did we call it quits because we were mad? 

I think God’s design was for us to take turns picking up passengers at the distribution centers. Then, follow the example of Paul when he said:

I planted the seed in your hearts, and Apollos watered it, but it was God who made it grow” (1 Corinthians 3:6).

See? When the seed is planted, the watering begins, and God can produce the proper growth.

However, rotten attitudes wreak havoc on growth. 

We aren’t always going to be pleasant passengers on this journey.

John Maxwell says,

"Attitude isn’t everything, but it is one thing that can make a big difference in your life.”

Who’s the precious cargo God has entrusted you with to help deliver to a new destination? Are you full of attitude or gratitude for the opportunity? 

Kolleen Lucariello, #TheABCGirl, is the author of #beYOU: Change Your Identity One Letter at a Time and is the Co-Director of Activ8Her, Inc. She is passionate to every woman realize her identity in Christ and live accordingly. Kolleen and her hubby, Pat, make their home in Central New York. She’s the mom of three grown children and Mimi to six incredible grands. For more information about Kolleen, visit www.speakkolleen.com.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Rene Rauschenberger at Pixabay.