Mommy Needs Her Beauty Rest

Arlene Pellicane, author of several “31 Days” books for wives and moms, offers a Parenting UPGRADE to help moms get that pep back in their step. 

“Often when children come into our lives, getting a good night’s sleep becomes an unattainable dream,” Arlene says, “Moms need to prioritize sleep because ‘mommy needs her beauty rest!’ Not just for outward beauty, but for inward strength.”

Oh, how I (Dawn) remember needing that sleep as a mom of young toddlers. When I didn’t get it, I was a Mama Bear—and not in the best sense!

Arlene continues . . .

When I’m running ragged, existing on little sleep, I am not a happy camper. But if I get enough sleep – and I’m talking about a solid eight hours here – I am even keeled, productive, and much more reasonable to myself and others. 

Somehow we’ve bought the lie that it’s nobler to do more and sleep less. Go ahead and take a hit on your personal health and survive on a few hours of sleep. You can catch up on sleep later, but your to-do list is now.

But I say, sleep more and be a nicer person.

My friend author Kendra Smiley says,

“For goodness sake mom, take care of yourself and get rest! I hear too many moms say the kids went to bed and then I stayed up until midnight to clean the oven and the kitchen. Stop it! The kids will not remember that your oven was clean. The kids will remember that you were cheerful when the day started.”

Isn’t that liberating and helpful to put things into perspective?

Being physically ready to start the day is more important than having a clean, sparkling kitchen.

Phew, that makes me feel better.  I’d much rather sleep than clean.

Here are a few benefits of a good night’s sleep:

• Less risk of heart disease, heart attacks, diabetes, and obesity
• More energy for an enjoyable sex life
• Improved memory
• Stronger immunity
• Better mood
• Clearer thinking

Plus, you can lose weight after catching your Z’s. Researchers from the University of Chicago and Stanford University found a lack of sleep causes changes in hormones that increase appetite. After just two nights of sleep deprivation, their research subjects had a 24 percent increase in appetite and craved high-sugar, high-salt, starchy foods. Sound familiar?

Yet for many moms, getting a good night’s sleep is not as easy as it sounds. According to a National Sleep Foundation survey, more than half of Americans report at least one symptom of insomnia such as being unable to fall or stay asleep.

These do’s and don’ts will help you get your beauty rest. 

THE DON’Ts

1. Don’t drink caffeine late in the day. Caffeine provides a boost of energy and stimulates your brain – not something you want happening before bedtime.   

2. Don’t stare at the clock. If you haven’t fallen asleep after about 20 minutes, get out of bed and do something relaxing like reading in a different room until you feel sleepy. 

3. Don’t watch TV in bed. Set a curfew for all your screens one hour before bedtime.  The light from TV, tablets and computers alerts the brain and makes it harder to fall asleep. 

4. Don’t pay your bills or do work in bed. Use your bed for relaxation; not for a desk. 

THE DO’s

1. Do go to bed at a decent hour. Start getting ready for bed nine hours before you have to wake up.   

2. Do dim your lights. Turn off the lights you’re not using in the house and dim the lights in your bedroom a few minutes before bedtime. 

3. Do have calming pre-sleep rituals. Establish a routine such as reading a few minutes or journaling before lights out. 

4. Do keep a list handy. Write down those flashing thoughts of to-dos running through your brain. Once it’s written down, forget about it.

So are you ready for a good night’s sleep tonight?

Sleep is good! The Psalmist says, "... he gives to his beloved sleep" (Psalm 127:2, ESV).

Give yourself permission to dim the lights early. After all, you need your beauty rest and your kids would truly benefit from a nicer mom in the morning. 

Which of these do’s and don’ts would help you get a better night’s sleep?

Arlene Pellicane is a speaker and author of 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Mom. She is also the co-author of Growing Up Social: Raising Relational Kids in a Screen-Driven World (with Gary Chapman). She has been a featured guest on the Today Show, Fox & Friends, Focus on the Family, FamilyLife Today, The 700 Club, and Turning Point with Dr. David Jeremiah. Arlene lives in the San Diego area with her husband James and their three children. Visit her website at www.ArlenePellicane.com for free resources to help you have a happy home.    

A Surprising Way to Upgrade Your Sleep

I admire author Deedra Scherm for her dedication to family and the creativity she uses to teach and encourage her boys. This post about her choice not to compare herself with others is great advice for any woman, but especially moms with young children. They need encouragement … and sleep!

“This week I had a stranger make a comment to me about my kids,” Deedra said. “It’s not uncommon. I get several each week.”

I know Deedra’s mom, Dennie, and this young “apple” doesn’t fall far from Mama Tree! They both are creative and love children. But I digress. Deedra has some simple, profound wisdom that can make a difference!

She continues …

You see, we decided to start homeschooling our three young boys (ages four, six and eight) this year. So they are with me every day. All day. All. The. Time. Don’t stop reading! This won’t be a homeschool vs. private school vs. public school debate.

I was at the store picking up a few things, when the boys asked if they could look at the greeting cards. After a morning of teaching, my to-do list, and my lack of sleep the night before due to lesson planning … everything in me wanted to say, “No!  Keep on moving!” But I try to be a cool mom. 

Soooooo, I told them “Yes!” What followed were a few minutes of grabbing cards, extremely loud fall-on-the-ground laughing, and a whole bunch of, “Hey!  You’ve got to read this!” yelled back and forth. 

There was a woman who came up behind me as I was half slumped on my shopping cart. After watching for a few moments, she said, “You must really sleep well at night.”

Yes. Yes, I usually do.

But there are nights I don’t.  And the reason isn’t a lack of tiredness. 

Have you ever had those nights where you get in bed and your mind seems to go and go, replaying all the things you could have done or should have done? Visions of how much better life would be if you could just be more organized, eat a better diet, yell less at your kids, exercise more or even dress better?

Comparison is not hard to accomplish. It’s easy to look at the pictures our friends post on Facebook and feel less than good enough. 

I see homeschool families with all their kids sitting at the table together (all at once—can you imagine?) They’re doing some amazing craft project that I could never put together. I see other mothers (who have more kids than I do) tanned and toned and dressed in a size four. I see posts of women who have traveled to other countries building wells, tending to the sick, and rescuing orphans!

It’s easy to feel less than enough. But you don’t have to stay there, in a place of “I wish I could be more like that.” 

You could do what my friend Katie does.  I had to #LOL when she tweeted, “When I feel down about myself … I just watch an episode of “Hoarders” and then I don’t think I’m that bad.” 

Funny, but there is a better way. I’d like to share with you some things that have helped me kick the habit of bad comparison.

1. Rejoice!

Yes!  You should rejoice because God has created you wonderfully!  In Psalm 139:14 it says,  “I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made….”  When you feel less-than, stop and give thanks to God for how He made you. 

Just as Esther was created for “such a time as this,” you were also created for this exact moment.  God knew what your strengths and weaknesses would be, what your personality would be and the resources you would have at this time. He gave you the children, husband, job, neighbors and the family you have. God hasn’t missed one detail of your life, and you were created wonderfully for it. Rejoice that He will work it all for good!

2. Refocus! 

God doesn’t want you to focus on the business of others. I love this little tucked-away verse in John 21 where Peter ask Jesus about circumstances with one of the other disciples, and Jesus says to him in verse 22, “… what is that to you? You follow Me!” 

When you see a Facebook post that makes you feel envious or frustrated, or when you are with someone who seems to have it all together and makes you feel less-than, it’s time to change directions. When you feel like focusing on what others are doing, stop yourself and say, “What is that to me?” and refocus on what God has called YOU to do today.

3. Release!

Take a moment to release the negative pressure you put on yourself. Reflect on the fact that God is responsible for making things “perfect”…not you. Stop worrying that you have to do more or be more in order to make everything work out. Philippians 1:6 says,  “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”  

Even in the midst of a struggle, you are promised that God will continue to work in you to work things out. You can trust Him! Keep recalling this verse to mind until you can release the outcome of your circumstances into the loving hands of Jesus.

Rejoice ... refocus ... and release! It might not be a lullaby, but it sure helps me sleep better at night!

Which of these three tips for upgrading sleep is the most challenging for you today? What choice can you make to change that?

Deedra Scherm lives in Dallas with her husband and three boys. Between homeschooling and writing, she's on constant watch out for "parents night out" so she and her hubby can get one of bookthose things called a date night. You can find her best selling book, The ABC Bible Verse Book,  and other books and DVDs at lemonvision.com or at  amazon.com.