Do Your Clothes Complement Your Life Message?

I asked Pat Ennis, the Director of Homemaking Programs at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary in Fort Worth, to share from her expertise. Here are some thoughts on upgrading our appearance to the glory of God.

“What is your Life Message,” Ennis asks. “Or have you never really considered the need to develop a statement that guides your decision-making process?”

She continues…   

My Life Message is a guide that controls my decisions. As a Christian, my Life Message began when I was adopted into God’s eternal family (spiritual birth) and continues until I draw my final breath.

It even affects the clothes I choose to wear. Let me explain.

1. The central theme of one’s Life Message is to focus on passions that will have eternal value.

Perhaps the questions that I use to evaluate my life will assist you in selecting clothing.

• With what issues do I want my name associated?
• When my Lord calls me home or He comes for me, what evidence of your faith will others find when they sort through my belongings?
• Will they be drawn to the One who loved and redeemed me, or will they only be impressed by my accomplishments, accolades, and possessions?
• When I meet my Lord, will He say of me, “Pat, you chose the good part, which will not be taken away from you?” (Luke 10:42)

 2. Modesty is the foundational criterion for selecting clothing to complement your Life Message.

 Spiritually, modesty is an issue of the heart. 

In the New Testament, modesty goes beyond the adornment of clothing to include inner beauty and attitude. Modesty calls for avoidance of anything that is impure or short of biblical standards. If your thoughts are focused on the attributes found in Philippians 4:8-9, then likely your external appearance will be modest.

Your sense of modesty will be regulated most of all by your commitment to Christ. Beauty and fashion are not condemned by the Bible, but they must be expressed through the lens of Scripture.

3. The number of garments in your wardrobe is important. Too many garments can reflect that more attention is being focused on the outer appearance rather than complementing your character (1 Corinthians 12:23; 1 Timothy 2:9). Carefully selecting garments to align with your season of life and its accompanying responsibility allows you to practice the principle of modesty.

4. Quality workmanship is another key criterion. A carefully selected garment constructed with quality workmanship will serve the wearer through numerous seasons. By choosing garments with quality workmanship, the wardrobe will not require constant replenishing. This is especially true for the maturing woman.

5. Use your “Personal Shopper.” Upscale department stores frequently provide a personal shopper service to assist their clients in selecting clothing.

Christian women have the most reliable personal shopper available, the timeless Word of God. As its truth is applied to their clothing choices, they will find that what they are wearing will consistently support their Life Message (Proverbs 31:18, 21, 25; 1 Timothy 2:9-10; 1 Peter 3:3-4).

What is your Life Message?

Pat Ennis is a distinguished professor of Homemaking and Director of Homemaking Programs at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, Fort Worth, Texas. She is a speaker and author, and her most recent release is The Christian Homemaker’s Handbook with Dorothy Patterson (Crossway, March 2013).

Before Your Next Date with Hubby

Arlene Pellicane offers lots of marriage tips in her book, 31 Days to a Happy Husband; What a Man Needs Most from His Wife. I'm glad she's willing to share some of them with our Project UPGRADE readers. In this post, Arlene encourages women to think through some practical ideas for "dating" Hubby.

"You know you’re supposed to go on date nights. People say it’s good for your marriage, kind of like taking a multivitamin," Pellicane says. "Yet you’re dragging your feet (taking vitamins isn’t sexy). Your schedule’s packed and dinner and movie just don’t seem that important."

Pellicane continues... 

As a mother of three young children, let me lean in closer and whisper in your ear:

Don't forget to date!

It’s critical to stay connected emotionally, physically and spiritually to your spouse. The daily grind typically doesn’t cater to that, so you have to create space to connect and have fun together. You don’t want to slowly drift apart over the years and end up as roommates. Instead, you want to keep courting!  

Here are four tips for your next date with hubby:   

1. Be playful and fun.  Date night is not the time to whip out the calendars and hash out who’s going to pick up dinner and who’s going to visit Aunt Grace in the hospital.

I love what Dr. David Clarke says about dating:

When you go out together on a “date,” it’s not romantic. It’s not playful. It’s not a time of fun and laughter. You’re going through the motions. It’s a good idea to go out on dates, so that’s what you’re doing. 

“We had a nice time,” you say. A date is not supposed to be a “nice time.” You have a “nice time” with your mother, or your Aunt Bertha. A real date with your spouse ought to be fun, stimulating, romantic and sensual. That’s why you got married!

2. Do something different. It could be as simple as trying a new restaurant or going to the mall and sampling new perfumes and colognes. If it’s always dinner and a movie, try a picnic dinner at the lake instead. 

3. Look your best. Just like you’d touch up your makeup before going to a party with friends, make sure you look attractive to your spouse. Be aware of your husband’s taste. (He may prefer a natural look or bright red lipstick, your hair up or your hair down.) My friend’s husband loves to see her in red. She doesn’t like red, but she does look great in it. She bought a few red blouses so she could go out with her husband … wearing red.

4. Heap him with praise. Date night is appreciation night! Spend the time complimenting your spouse about certain things he did that week. Hold his hand and cuddle up together. Be thinking about things you appreciate about your man and tell him all about it on date night. 

Which of these Hubby-dating tips encourages you to UPGRADE your relationship?

Arlene Pellicane is a speaker and author of 31 Days to a Happy Husband and 31 Days to a Younger You.  She has been featured on Family Life Today, The Better Show, The 700 Club, Turning Point with Dr. David Jeremiah, The Hour of Power, and TLC’s Home Made Simple. Arlene lives in Southern California with her husband James and three children, Ethan, Noelle, and Lucy.

What Do You See in the Mirror?

Meet Lynn Mosher: Lynn writes about many topics, but I was struck by one she wrote about women's appearance.

"In the morning," she said, "when you get up and look into the bathroom mirror, scratching here and there, what stares back at you? Do you like that image? When you’re all gussied up, do you like that image better?"

Lynn shares some simple tips to help women consider their appearance from a biblical perspective.

Body image. We all have one of ourselves, whether positive or negative. Unfortunately, having a negative body image affects many women (and men). The media pressures us with the ideas of being young, slim, and wrinkle free.

However, our true image comes from God, as the Bible tells us in Genesis 1:27. When God looks at you, what does He see? He sees His beautiful child - the physical temple for the presence of His Holy Spirit (1 Cor. 6:19 NLT).

So, how do we view His temple? Naturally, we all want to look our best, but a good appearance does not always indicate a healthy body. If you want to change the image you have of your body by dieting, surgery, or injections, what is the real reason behind it? Is your focus an outward appearance or a healthier body?

Does our body image attitude spurn the image God gave us? How do we treat our body? Most of us would do well to respect the earthly body God gave us by having better eating habits, drinking more water, getting more exercise, sleeping more, etc.

Jesus said, “There is far more to your inner life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body.” (Luke 12:23 Msg)

We each have our own external presence, but it makes no difference to the Lord. Samuel said, “Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Sam. 16:7b NIV) He knows all about us, even the number of hairs on our head (Matthew 10:30 NIV). He knew us before He created us:  “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.” (Jeremiah 1:5 NKJV)

The next morning you look in the mirror and are tempted to grumble at what you see, say this to God as David did, “You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit them together in my mother’s womb. Thank You for making me so wonderfully complex! It is amazing to think about. Your workmanship is marvelous-and how well I know it.” (Psalm 139:13-14 TLB)

The mirror merely reflects the physical; the true mirror is Christ.

Do you reflect God's image?
“Glorify God by making your bodies the shrines of His presence.” (1 Corinthians 6:20 Knox)

Lynn Mosher lives with her hubby (since 1966) in their Kentucky nest, emptied of three chicklets and embraced three giggly grand-chicklets and an inherited dog. Lynn’s passion is to encourage others and glorify the Lord with her writing.

Stop by for a refill at her website, Heading Home, lynnmosher.com.

Note: Lynn recommends the book Body Image Lies Women Believe by Shelley Hitz.

          LINKED TO:  Raising Homemakers.

Five Tips for Cheap Chic

Meet Jill Swanson:  A couple of years ago, Jill stood in my bedroom, helping me go through my wardrobe—piece by piece. We made big piles to give away, throw away, mend, and set aside to look for items to complete outfits. My closet never looked so spacious and organized! Jill was especially sensitive to my limited budget and I still use her color insights. (Turquoise became my "signature" color that day!)

“You can have beauty without breaking the bank,” Jill said. “As a professional image consultant, I love to teach women how to look like million without spending it.”

Here are a few of Jill’s favorite tips.

1. Organize first, shop later. Sort out the good, the bad and the ugly. This will reacquaint you with what you already own and possibly set you up for some extra income. What was “bad” for you could be good for someone else. Consignment stores are always looking for up-to-date, gently-worn clothing to resell, and that means money in your pocket. 

2. Get creative. Ugly can become useful. Before you trash that white blouse with the yellowed armpits – harvest the unique buttons off of it. I find beautiful buttons, appliqué and lace on garage sale garments and transplanted them onto my tired wardrobe basics.

3. “Know thyself” and dress accordingly. Go back to the “good” – what worked for you? Was it the color? Style? Fabric? Or perhaps just the fact that it fit a role in your lifestyle.  If you stay at home and have a closet full of business clothes, it’s time to reprioritize and spend your money where you spend your time. Give yourself permission to buy better quality and get a good fit in your “at-home” clothes. Duplicate winning colors and styles from those tried and true pieces that worked in your past.

4. Accessorize and shop wisely.  Invest in scarves, jewelry and add-ons (vests, belts, etc.) to change your look with a little color and decor. Shop consignment stores and department store sale racks for clothes (better quality). Use import shops and teen departments for trendy accessories.

5. Minimize. Learn to be content with less. Owning a few pieces that look fabulous on you is better than having much that looks mediocre!

What's your favorite fashion tip?

Jill Swanson, Image Coach, author and Christian speaker, helps women make the most of what they’ve been blessed with. For consultations (online or in person) and or to check out Jill's newest book, Out the Door in 15 Minutes, please visit www.jillswanson.com.