Keep on Comforting and Encouraging

This is something that I shared on Facebook on December 17th. I want to share it here as well—and expand on it a bit—because I think we all need a Compassion UPGRADE.

I've been "watching" someone who has suffered for a long time. As the years go by, some of her friends have fallen away, because it's awkward to them that nothing changes. It's so sad.

Confession Time

I "fell away" from encouraging a friend years ago too—a grieving brother in the family of God—because:

1. I got busy in life;
2. I didn't know what else I could say. I didn't know how to keep on encouraging him as he was hurting . . . and it went on and on for years.

So I just prayed—which wasn't bad, but it wasn't enough.

I could have reached out more.

The longer I didn't write to encourage him, the worse I felt. The harder it got.

I reasoned that I didn't want to be like one of Job's unhelpful counselors, doing more damage than helping.

But the truth is, there were many ways I could have expressed God's (and my) loving concern.

It wasn't that I didn't love my brother in Christ; I just didn't know how to "relate" to his suffering anymore.

I understand now that I could have continued to share simple truths:

• "I'm still praying for you," or
• "God sees and loves you."

I could have spoken God's truth into his pain from a caring heart.

I could have asked him, "How can I pray specifically for you today—physically, emotionally, mentally, socially, spiritually?" I even could have sent resources to remind Him I cared.

I learned that lesson the hard way, and it made me more sensitive to "continue" to encourage others who hurt.

We never know how God might use our words or actions to encourage others. If we take time to think about it, there are many ways to comfort those who struggle.

When we're with them, we might take their hands in ours, look them in the eyes, and say, "I love you and I'm praying for you."

Sometimes, it's just a matter of sitting with them in their times of grief or pain.

A woman once told me the most meaningful thing that happened to her all day at a funeral for her husband was that I simply sat beside her and held her hand for an hour . . . no words, just my presence.

Keep on comforting and encouraging—any way you can!

One other thing. I am thankful the Bible says we have a friend who "sticks" with us, closer than a brother (Prov. 18:24). He never leaves us, and He knows how to comfort us in our struggles. We may feel he has deserted us in our circumstances, but the promise is "He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you" (Deut. 31:8b NLT).

Sometimes it's "no words" . . . just God's wonderful presence.

How about you? Is there someone you might encourage today? Someone you once encouraged, but you've been busy, or maybe you fretted over what to say?

Why not simply stop right now and write to or tell that person you care and are praying? It will mean a lot.

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Today, is a speaker and author, and the creator the blog, Upgrade with Dawn. She is a contracted researcher/reviewer for women's teacher and revivalist, Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth at Revive Our Hearts, and is a regular columnist at Crosswalk.com. She and her husband Bob live in sunny Southern California, and Dawn has traveled with Him in Pacesetter Global Outreach. They have two grown, married sons, three granddaughters and a rascally maltipoo, Roscoe.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of AlexasFotos at Pixabay.

Christmas on the Corner

In this Christmas UPGRADE, Life Coach and retreat guide, Letitia Suk, writes about a time when God had a plan for her when she visited her local CVS.

Letitia says, “Most of my God shows-up moments do not happen in church!

I (Dawn) know what Letitia means! Sometimes, I almost missed ministry opportunities because they didn't exactly look like "ministry."

Letitia continues . . .

The season of Christmas is filled with the FAMILIAR. Takes so much decision fatigue out of a usually overbooked season to know what’s coming next.

Take Christmas Carols for example. Whether we hear the tunes as the soundtrack of the mall or blasting on our car radios, we can usually sing right along—familiar.

Hard to like a new Christmas Carol, right?

This story doesn’t change either.

Everyone knows the parts, the characters, the set, what happens next, who says what, the beginning and the end. Go to a Nativity play in any part of the world and you’ll recognize the plot.

Want a fresh perspective? Get inside the story.

And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night (Luke 2:8).

These guys weren’t going angel hunting or trying out for a part in the Greatest Story Ever Told. They were just going to work that night. 

They kissed their wives goodbye, grabbed their midnight snack and walked to work. Probably a lot like you did today, different line of work,

• Zechariah was doing “his priestly duty.”  Why? Because he was a priest! Just like you do duties associated with your jobs.
• Joseph was sleeping.  Doesn’t get much more mundane than that!
• Mary was likely doing chores of some sort.
• The Magi were doing their astronomy because that’s what Magi did.

What are YOU doing each day? Count on it that God will bust in on your world at any time and place.

God intersects with our world exactly where we are.

Like the time I stopped into the pharmacy after work. Don’t you do that too?

On my way into the store, my eye caught a $20 bill on the ground. At first. I thought it was fake, but it was a very real $20 bill.

Right away I heard something like, “Don’t get too attached to this—it is not for you.” My interest was piqued!

The sound of crying was more obvious that the carols. A very distraught international college student who was informed the clinic closed a little early. Too late for her to be seen despite her desperate pleas. She broke down. I headed towards her and heard the story.

She was a vocalist with a performance the next day and a very sore throat. She was hoping to get to the clinic, get treatment and sing the next day. (Aren’t we all hoping for something?)

She had borrowed $20 from her roommate for the cab to get there and now, the clinic had turned her away.

She had no treatment, no $20, no ride home, and no apparent options.

I thought she had a valid point and pounded on the clinic door to plead for her. They wouldn’t reopen for me either.

I got the manager involved and he was kind and offered me 20% off any purchases. I wasn’t the one who needed help.

With no other plan, I invited her into my car and drove her home. On the way, I told her about the $20 and gave it to her.

She seemed a bit incredulous. Me too.

Feeling bold, I offered to pray for her. Maybe because she was trapped in my car, she agreed and mentioned no one had ever prayed for her before.

I have no idea what happened after that as I never saw her again, but somehow, I think she got her treatment after all.

God knows where you are at all times. Expect that He will use you in mostly familiar settings.

From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places that they should live (Acts 17:26).

In those places, he will tap you on the shoulder and invite you into something bigger.

Especially this time of year, look around and listen.

You are about to step into the story.

How has God used you in a familiar place?

Letitia (Tish) Suk invites women to create an intentional life centered in Jesus. She is a blogger and author of 100 Need to Know Tips for Moms of Tweens and Teens, Getaway with God: The Everywoman’s Guide to Personal Retreat, and Rhythms of Renewal. She is a speaker, personal retreat guide and life coach in the Chicago area. Visit Letitia at her website.

Graphic adapted,

Breathe Life! How to Upgrade Hope

Pam Farrel is a pro when it comes to applying biblical truth to the tough situations of life. In this Relationship UPGRADE, she inspires us to "breathe life" and hope wherever we can.

"God is a specialist at breathing life into seemingly hopeless situations," Pam Farrel says.

And there is the secret. Although Pam is a relationship expert, the best "specialist" in hope is the Lord, and Pam encourages us to tap into that power source.

Pam continues . . .

My grandmother scarred her lungs rushing into a barn on fire to rescue animals. As an elderly woman, she needed her oxygen tank to breathe life into her.

In a similar way, God wants us to be those who breathe life into difficult moments—and sometimes into difficult people!  

The Lord, Himself, is the breath of life:

 “And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being”  (Gen 2:7 NKJV).

 “The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by human hands.  And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything. Rather, he himself gives everyone life and breath and everything else" (Acts 17:24–25).

God wants us to be more like Him, more of a life-giver.

In Deuteronomy 30:19-20, God’s heart is evident :

"This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob."

This “choose life” principle can be extended to apply to all kinds of situations: the seeming death of a dream, the spiraling downward of the life of someone you love, a business on a decline or in any situation that feels stuck or hopeless.

Seek to breathe life by simply asking:

• What would bring life to this situation?
• What would bring life to this person?
• Who has the skills, talents, time, and/or energy to resuscitate or revive this circumstance (or person) to bring life?

Most recently, our family saw this “life-giver” philosophy change a situation that seemed beyond hopeless.

My father-in-law is 86 and he had fallen. He was being released from a convalescent home, but he was not strong enough to function in his home—and my 86-year-old mother-in-law was too feeble to give the kind of care needed.

We had a full speaking schedule and it is our sole income, and thousands of people in our audiences would be impacted if we cancelled, so it was near impossible for either Bill or me to be the caregiver. (We were willing, but it felt impossible.)

However, we knew both mom and dad would be more comfortable if the caregiver could be someone they already knew.

Our youngest son, Caleb, came to us and said, “I believe God has called me to breathe life into Grandpa’s situation.”

Caleb was a recent graduate from an engineering program, and he had three weeks available to use before moving to another state for his Master’s program. Caleb was football player and had just completed building a block home on the mission field—so he was strong enough to carry his grandfather. Also, because Bill’s father was an aerospace engineer, the two already had much in common.  

Caleb moved in, was trained by all the health care professionals, and began to rehab his grandfather. In addition, those two engineers redesigned doorways and gates, a patio, a desk and a wheelchair to make them more user-friendly for Dad. 

Caleb is such a workhorse that when he wasn’t caring for grandpa, he rebuilt the patio, a ramp, a gate and several other areas of their home to help give Dad independence and access.

In just two weeks, Dad went from what appeared to be death’s door, to stronger mentally and physically than we had seen him function in several decades.

Caleb breathed vibrant life into the situation!

Who can you breathe life into today?

Pam Farrel is the author of 45 books, an international speaker, and relationship expert who seeks to breathe life into people’s most vital relationships through the ministry she runs with her husband, Love-Wise. Today’s blog is adapted from her newest book, 7 Simple Skills for Every Woman: Success At Keeping It All Together.

Graphic: adapted, courtesy of Jan Schultz, Webdesigner Stuttgart, Unsplash.