The 'Trick to Treating' Fear Until It Disappears

Kathy Carlton Willis, an author and speaker, shares an Attitude UPGRADE today about fear. Halloween-time seems to be all about spooking people. As Kathy shares a memory from her growing-up years, she substitutes Kathy’s “trick-or-treat” with a “trick for treating” fear until it disappears. 

“When I was a young girl, I had quite an imagination, and just as many fears,” Kathy says. “For example, I was convinced there was a monster under my bed. I just knew he had several knives positioned to pierce my sleeping body at any moment. I’m not sure how many times my mom reassured me that there was nothing under my bed but a little dust!”

I (Dawn) think all of us had some sort of imaginary monster fear in our childhood. But it’s those grown-up fears that really do a number on us. I love Kathy's remedy for sending fears packing.

Kathy continues . . . 

I like using an acronym for fear to remind myself why I should not worry about “what ifs.”

False

      Evidence

            Appearing

                  Real

Whenever we struggle with fears, it is important to realize that our feelings often lie to us, and we must override our heart with our mind at times by trying to focus on facts.

The Spirit within us is often a still small voice. In order to hear Him we must first quiet the loud fears to listen to the real truths. Truth is always there, we just don’t see or hear it because truth gets covered up by our fears.

Truths are comforting; fears are overwhelming.

Truths never change; fears are always changing.

You can be certain God isn’t orchestrating your fears and confusion. And if you feel powerless, like no one loves you, or like you might lose your mind, see what Scripture says:

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind" (2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV).

Journaling can help us deal with our fears. It helps us put into words the dark clouds we sometimes struggle explaining to someone else.

We can overcome our fears by clinging to the promise that God is always with us. Prayer and meditation give us wisdom and strength to deal with fears outside of our own abilities to cope.

Some people are more fearful than others. Perhaps this is due to personality traits. Or baggage we carry from our life experiences. But all of us deal with a certain amount of fear.

When we face our fears head on, we can deal with them in productive ways. At most, ten percent of our fears become reality. Isn’t it sad to spend so much time worrying about something that likely will never come to pass?

Fears are like monsters under the bed.

They aren’t really there, but they scare us so much we are often too paralyzed to get up and look under the bed to prove to ourselves the monsters are merely figments of our imagination.

Is there a monster under your bed?

Consider this:

"For the LORD your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs" (Zephaniah 3:17 NLT).

How can the reality of God's love help calm your fears?

Kathy Carlton Willis writes and speaks with a balance of funny and faith—whimsy and wisdom. Not many funny girls also have Bible degrees! Kathy’s a pastor’s wife, which gives her plenty of opportunities to grin with grace. She shines the light on issues that hold women back and inspires their own lightbulb moments. Almost a thousand of Kathy’s articles have been published in books, magazines, newspapers and online publications. Her books, Grin with Grace and Speaker to Speaker: The Essential Speaker’s Companion are receiving rave reviews. Kathy lives with her pastor/husband, Russ, in Rockdale, Texas. Kathy’s website tagline describes her best: Light & Lively: His Reflection/Her Laughter.

Face Your Fears with T-E-A-R-S

Twila Belk’s positive attitude encourages others to look to Jesus. In this Attitude UPGRADE, the author/speaker shares her approach to dealing with fears.

“Whatever we focus on becomes magnified in our minds,” Twila says. “If we concentrate on our fears, they overwhelm us.”

Fears come and go, and I (Dawn) likely have as many fears as you do. We can’t stop the thoughts of fear from entering our minds, but we don’t have to let them take up residence!

Twila continues …

• “How will I pay the bills?”
• “Where will I live?”
• “Who’s going to take care of me?”
• “How will I survive?”
• “What if it’s cancer?”

Sometimes we become so absorbed in the problems that produce these and similar questions, we can’t think about anything else. We dread the unknown.

During those times, a shift in focus is necessary. We need to fix our eyes—on God.

When we have complications seeing, we might fix our eyesight with a product called Artificial Tears.

When our spiritual vision is obscured, and we can’t imagine anything but trouble, the best remedy is T-E-A-R-S.

Let me explain what I mean.

T – TRUST. Trust is the opposite of fear.

Proverbs 3:5-6  tells us to trust God with ALL our heart. We’re supposed to acknowledge Him in ALL our ways. If we do that, He promises to direct our paths—to take care of us. We’re not left to flounder on our own.

The better we know Him, the easier it is to trust Him.

E – ETERNAL-MINDEDNESS. In 2 Corinthians 4:17-18, we’re encouraged to fix our eyes not on what we see—the difficulties surrounding us—but on what we don’t see. The visible things are temporary and changing, but God and His promises are eternal.

If our hope is in Christ, we can endure the here and now through God’s bubble of grace, knowing that the best is yet to come.

A – ABIDE. Psalm 91:1 says, “He (she) who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.”

To me, that’s a picture of crawling up on the Father’s lap and resting in His warm embrace. There we express our intimate thoughts to Him, pour out our hearts, and share what’s bothering us. As we’re on his lap, we hear his heartbeat and realize that it’s beating for us. With every pulsation we’re reminded how special we are to Him, how big He is, and that He has everything under control.

In the arms of our loving Father is the safest and most comfortable place to be.

R – REMEMBER. We easily become forgetful when face-to-face with adversity. The things we know to be true about God go by the wayside.

That’s why we need to continually rehearse His goodness and faithfulness. When we remember what God has done for us (or others) in the past, we can trust Him for today and tomorrow.

S – SET. David says in Psalm 16:8, “I have set the Lord always before me. Because He is at my right hand, I won’t be shaken.”

Here’s how we can set the Lord always before us:

• Meditate on Him throughout the day.
• Carry on a running conversation with Him.
• Memorize His promises and verses that speak of His greatness and repeat them often.
• Post scriptural truths in much-seen places.
• Sing praises.   

I’ve learned that my circumstances don’t change who God is; they show me who God is.

When I apply T-E-A-R-S to my tribulations, I see clearly that God’s presence, power, and provision are all I need. I pray you’ll discover that as well.

Do you have a nagging fear? How might you apply the T-E-A-R-S concept to that fear?

Twila Belk—aka The Gotta Tell Somebody Gal—is a writer and speaker who loves braggin’ on God. She’s written or co-written five books, contributed to several others, and recently started work on a new project, Raindrops from Heaven, that will release early next year. To learn more about Twila, including her newest title, I Believe in Heaven: Real Stories from the Bible, History and Today, visit her website, www.gottatellsomebody.com.

Eight Ways to Respond to Fear

Whether fraught with many fears or only occasionally caught in their grasp, it’s important to know how to respond when fear-causing circumstances arrive.

1. Face your fear. Financial upheavals, government turmoil, wars, natural disasters and the ravages of disease are just a few catalysts to fear; and many Christians suffer for their faith (Hebrews 11:32-38).

God means for us to face all our fears with Him. Jesus said, “… you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world” (John 16:33b).   

2. Find the sting – Paul asks, “O death, where is your sting?” (1 Corinthians 15:55) The Message translates this, “Oh, Death, who’s afraid of you now?” Because of Christ’s victory over sin and death, the believer can have victory, not fear.

No matter the “sting” of difficult circumstances, there is comfort in the midst of pain, hope in the midst of devastation and more. Define the sting, and discover the antidote in Christ.

3. Feel the pain – Sometimes emotions run deep. Read the Psalms and discover man’s gamut of emotions, including fear.

Rather than running from emotions, give yourself permission to feel them so you can deal with them. Don’t hide, shut down or reject the truth of what’s happening. Behind many fears is the reality or perception of loss. Don’t get morbid, but acknowledge what loss feels like and choose to grieve well.

4. Free your mind – In the movie After Earth, the character played by Will Smith says, “Fear … is a product of thoughts you create. … Danger is very real. But fear is a choice.” It’s true. We cannot escape the feeling of fear when it comes, but we choose what we do next.

We can counter the enemy’s lies. Jesus says to his abiding disciples, “you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:32). God wants to renew and transform our thoughts (Romans 12:2). He desires to give us a spirit of power, love, and a calm, well-balanced mind of discipline and self-control (2 Timothy 1:7).

5. Frame your responses – My dad encouraged me to think through my fears, asking, “What’s the worst that could happen?” He helped me examine my choices.

When fear comes, consider your options. Create a “how to” notebook as a resource of helpful information. Make a list of crisis steps.  Imagine acting with wisdom, courage and obedience, no matter what comes—like Daniel (6:7-22) and Esther (3:5-6; 4:1-16).

6. Feed your faith – The person who is armed with biblical resources is better prepared to face fears.

Feed your faith by memorizing and meditating on scripture and developing intimacy with God in prayer. Find mentors who have walked through trials with courage. Create a blessings journal and review God's faithfulness (Psalm 89:8; 115:1; Lamentations 3:22-23). Remembering how God’s presence got you through past trials will encourage you in today’s struggles (Psalm 91:3-6; 1 Corinthians 10:13).

7. Flourish in Friendships - Don’t go it alone. The Body of Christ is meant to come alongside with encouragement and comfort, and can do so because of the Comforter (the Helper) within (John 14:16, 26; 2 Corinthians 1:4). Reach out. Be transparent. Accept help.

8. Focus on praise – Be like Joseph (Genesis 50:20) and Job (Job 1:1; 19:25). Practice God-confidence and worship now, so it will be second-nature when tough times come.

What is your most powerful BIBLICAL response to fear?

Dawn Wilson is the founder of Heart Choices Ministries and creator of UpgradeWithDawn.com and also blogs at LOLwithGod.com. Dawn's ministry encourages, edifies and energizes women with the truth of scripture so they can better enjoy life, bless others and honor God. She lives in San Diego with her husband Bob and a rascally maltipoo named Roscoe.