When Christmas Doesn't Feel 'Christmasy'

Sally Ferguson is wise and caring, and both traits combine to make her a superb encourager. In this Christmas UPGRADE, she reaches out to those who might hurt at Christmas by offering wise counsel from a compassionate heart.“Financial distress. Health scares. Job insecurity. Family discord. When circumstances take you out of your security zone you can feel tossed at sea,” Sally said.

A note from Dawn: As a teenager, I heard the Elvis Presley song "Blue Christmas," and at age 14 I wondered, "Why would anyone not have a happy Christmas?" Fast forward not too many years and I discovered many reasons—both cultural and personal in origin. Sally recognizes that too, and she offers wise counsel to combat "Christmas-time blues."

Sally continues . . .

The "boat ride" we experience caring for my ninety-year-old father can leave us numb, even at Christmas.

I no longer panic when heading to the Emergency Room because hospital stays have become the norm. I just grab Dad’s medication info, a book to read, a bottle of water, snacks, and my phone charger.

Maybe you’ve experienced times of feeling down during the holidays. You try to get in a festive spirit but end up deflated instead.

In fact, there may be more people who can relate than you realize.

In a survey conducted by National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), “Approximately 755 of overall respondents reported that the holidays contribute to feeling sad or dissatisfied and 68% financially strained. 66% have experienced loneliness, 63% too much pressure and 57% unrealistic expectations. 55% found themselves remembering happier times in the past contrasting with the present, while 50% were unable to be with loved ones.”

How can we battle feeling discouraged during a season when we’re supposed to be full of happiness?

Here are some ways I combat the Christmas blues.

1. Enlist help. (Ecclesiastes 4:9)

Decorating, cooking, and cleaning multiply during the holidays. One of the ways we tackle the job of decorating is with a family tree trimming party.

Ornaments go up and cookies get washed down with homemade eggnog.

My sister pitches in with the baking and washing dishes.

Why not treat yourself to an early Christmas present by paying a college student or a grandchild to manage some of the household chores? It’s a win for both when your to-do list gets shortened, and they get some spending money for the holidays.

2. Manage expectations. (Psalm 46:10)

When you think about it, redecorating the house for one month seems ludicrous. I’ve amassed trinkets, wall art, couch pillows, mugs, scented candles, sleigh bells, yard ornaments, and a sundry collection to doll up my house.

At some point, we have to divvy up our treasures to bless others.

And some years, we don’t have to use the entire ensemble to usher in the season. Adjust according to your needs.

Be still and acknowledge God. Allow Him to help you manage your expectations.

3. Make time for fun. (Proverbs 23:4a)

Put aside your list for something you’ll enjoy.

• Drive to a Christmas light display with the grands and say “ooo" and "aah” with each exchange of wow factor.
• Go on a sleigh ride and feel the cold air in your lungs. If you live in a warm climate, take a nighttime boat ride down the canal to see the boats lit up in their finery.
• Watch a favorite Christmas movie and celebrate with popcorn.
• Take a break from shopping with a treat from the coffee shoppe.

Pace yourself! Do not "wear yourself out."

4. Run back to our Abba. (Ephesians 5:29)

We can take great comfort in God’s Word. Scripture is full of reminders that God is for us and God is with us; and our Abba wants us to take care of our bodies.

Maybe you’re cruising along well with the holidays, but do you have a friend who is dragging? What can you do to help? (Proverbs 3:27)

Here are some ways you might encourage your friend:

• Drop in with flowers and tea.
• Include her in your shopping trip.
• Send a verse and a word of encouragement.
• Bring a hug and a listening ear.
• Wrap presents together and listen to carols.
• Bake Christmas cookies together.
• Tackle an item on her list.

Sometimes the best encouragement is an emoji in a text. It lets the person know you’re there and you care.

When you meet another at her point of need, you are an ambassador for the Babe who arrived at Christmas. You're the one who represents Jesus in the flesh—our Emmanuel who cares about every detail we face.

This Christmas, whether you have “all the feels” or not, may you know without a doubt you are important to the One who created you. He loves you so much that His Son died on the cross that you might have a full and abundant life (John 10:10).

Rejoice in this great truth:

“I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people; for today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord” (Luke 2:10-11 NASB).

Which tip to combat the Christmas blues seems doable to you?

Sally Ferguson lives in western New York with her husband, and her dad. She writes to shine hope in darkness and often does so by revealing her own struggles. Sally’s latest article released December 1^st in Michelle Rayburn’s collective, Renewed Christmas Blessings. Visit her website at sallyferguson.net to see other work and to get a copy of her mom’s famous eggnog!

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Larisa Koshkina at Pixabay.

Is Fundraising Biblical?

Sally Ferguson writes devotionals and articles of consequence, and she even wrote a coloring book for children. As a speaker, she helps women find encouragement from God's Word. She is also helps women plan women's retreats and leads them herself. In this Biblical Discernment UPGRADE, Sally asks a question about fundraising, a topic dear to her heart.

“I was surprised recently to learn some people don’t think churches and Christian ministries should do fundraisers,” Sally said.

Fundraising can be a hot-button issue in some Christian circles, but I (Dawn) think Sally explores it with both insight and compassion.

Sally continues . . .

As one who was in church with my parents every time the doors were open, I grew up with a well-rounded view of the church and money.

My sister and I were eager to put our coins in the offering plate when passed down the row. It was seen as a privilege to be a part of God’s work.

When I graduated to the youth group, we each became a part of the fundraising team to ensure all could afford our ministry opportunities.

Church camp and youth conventions were a time of teaching God’s Word and growing in relationships. We came home from our mountaintop experiences ready to tell our friends at school about the transformation we’d encountered and how Jesus could make a difference in their lives, too.

Had we not done fundraising, maybe half of the group could not have attended.

It’s unthinkable that some of us would not have been included in those trips.

In the years following, I’ve been a part of fundraising for all types of church events, so it puzzled me that someone wouldn’t consider it biblical. It made me want to find out for myself what God says about our finances.

Exploring Fundraising Biblically

1. We’re told in Malachi to bring a tithe to God.

That foundational gift is to honor God’s care of us. He gives us all things, but only requires a tenth given back to support the ministry of His House, as planned in Numbers 18:21.

“Bring your full tithe to the Temple treasury so there will be ample provisions in my Temple. Test me in this and see if I don’t open up heaven itself to you and pour out blessings beyond your wildest dreams” (Malachi 3:10 MSG).

2. The early church modeled community for us in the way they took care of each other.

Acts 2:42-47 tells us people sold their possessions in order to provide for unmet needs.

People were so excited about what they were seeing take place around them, they joined forces to expand their reach.

3. In Romans 15:27, Paul says it is right for us to share our material blessings with those who bless us spiritually.

Have you felt joy when you gave to another? It has a boomerang effect in blessing the giver as much as the receiver.

Not only has fundraising helped our church reach goals of sending people on mission trips and building campaigns to expand ministry facilities, but it has also helped to build camaraderie within the church.

The process of working together toward a common goal bonds us together and builds community.

When we witness something accomplished that is bigger than ourselves, we get a faith boost because we know God is at work in our midst.

“In the Messiah, in Christ, God leads us from place to place in one perpetual victory parade. Through us, he brings knowledge of Christ” (2 Corinthians 2:14 MSG).

So, let’s circle back to the beginning.

What Is Fundraising?

Fundraising is raising funds for a particular need that otherwise wouldn’t be met. It’s money pooled together above and beyond the general tithe for a specific occasion.

Maybe you would call it an offering or a gift, but fundraising can look like many different things:

• A new church van for picking up children for Sunday School
• Packaged goods for the church food pantry.
• Bottle and can drive for missions.

One more story.

Our church issued a Backpack Challenge for members to fill backpacks with school supplies. One little girl turned in hers with a request. She had added clothes in her size for another girl to have for the first days of school.

Our youth pastor agreed to pray for that specific recipient.

Later that week, she received a call from a local agency. Guess what they asked for? Yep, that specific size was needed for a little girl!

Two gals learned about the power of prayer and that God cares about the details—when one responded to a fundraiser.

It was a great reminder to all of us that the smallest can teach us the biggest lessons.

What does fundraising look like to you?

Proverbs 3:9 admonishes us to honor God with all of our possessions. May we do so with generous and joyful hearts and wallets, as we look for ways to enhance ministry opportunities beyond the walls of our church.

What do you think? Is fundraising biblical?

Sally Ferguson is a teacher of God’s Word and a student of people. Whether leading retreats or small groups, she loves to see the light shine when hope abounds. Sally lives in western New York with her husband and her dad. Her current project is a Bible study for caregivers. Catch up with her at sallyferguson.net.  

Open Your Child's Eyes to the World

Sally Ferguson's worldview informs everything she does, including how she parents. In this Parenting UPGRADE, she notes the pull of the world and suggests some ways we might open our children's eyes to the world in a godly way.

“Our children are exposed to the world’s view of life through television and the internet," Sally says. "I wanted to find a way to help them see God’s view of the world."

I (Dawn) love this approach to parenting. The world wants to open our children's eyes, but not always in the way we appreciate! How much better that parents think proactively and give their children a view of the world from heaven's perspective, especially a view of missions.

Sally continues . . .

Every time I travel to Uganda, I marvel at the joy I see in believers. Our view of trials is vastly different and worthy of note.

We have a lot to learn from our brothers and sisters around the world—their view of possessions does not dominate their view of their wealth.

How can a mom translate that to her children and cultivate a Christian worldview?

Open Your Child's Eyes to the World

1. Explore, Don't Shelter.

My peacekeeper personality has always wanted to shelter my children from the dangers and drama of this world. Instead, the news infiltrates all of society.

If we let it, this becomes an opportunity to discuss a Christ-like response to the events of our day.

Explore ideas. What are some ways you can talk about school shootings and political character assassinations? How can a Christian respond with faith rather than fear?

• Research topics together with reputable organizations like Answers in Genesis and Focus on the Family. (1)
• Take a road trip and visit The Museum of the Bible for perspective. (2)

2. Grab Their Passion.

Missionaries on furlough travel to share their experiences. Contact them ahead of time to fit into their schedule. You have an opportunity to hear their stories over a meal or an outing. You’ll find contagious enthusiasm about the world from their vantage point. (3)

When our missionaries and their four children came to our home for a visit, my kids had a grand time playing and hearing about life in Africa.

We took them to a state park where they enjoyed the lush scenery and hiking paths. It was a win for all.

3. Encourage Their Questions.

Spark your child's curiosity by looking up the location of missionaries on the globe. (4)

• Talk about the details of traveling there, living there, and interacting with the culture.
• What do they eat?
• What language do they speak?
• How do they get to school?

My friend Dani hosts dinners for her children. They:

• research a country,
• wear costumes to imitate the local style,
• eat native foods,
• and practice some words in the language of that country.

Her children are learning to embrace other cultures.

4. Stamp your Passport.

The family that travels together celebrates life!

We are a part of an intricate human race. Open up a world of possibilities to your children by taking them on missions trips. Not only does a team invest in the culture, but it also invests in each other as a support system while together.

Your child will connect with adults who have a mindset to serve and learn.

When you immerse yourself in another culture, you experience it with all five senses on high alert.

People become more than names—they take on the warm flesh of humanity.

One of our church trips to Africa included three family units. They created a lifetime of memories in their travels and made room in their hearts for others. Thirteen years later, those families still talk about the adventure they had together.

5. Lead by Example.

Children imitate what they see us do.

Our involvement with global issues informs their willingness to get involved. Inspire them to think outside the box.

• Could they set up a lemonade stand or mow lawns to raise money for child sponsorship?
• Could they draw pictures or write to encourage a child across the globe?

My friend Debbie includes her granddaughters in visits to shut-ins. They make someone else’s day with their artwork while learning to serve.

As a country, America has been blessed with abundance. In Romans 15:27, Paul says it is right for us to share our material blessings with those who bless us spiritually.

I have seen a wealth of joy come from the most humble of circumstances and realized I am the impoverished one. We could never outgive that gift of joy.

Let your children experience the world with you—in tow.

Let faith inform your conversations and provide a solid foundation as they move toward adulthood.

Instead of raising worldly children, let’s raise world-class Christians.

How will you show your child the world?

Sally Ferguson is a teacher of God’s Word and a student of people. Whether leading retreats or small groups, she loves to see the light shine when hope abounds. Sally lives in western New York with her husband and her dad. Her current project is a Bible study for caregivers. Catch up with her at sallyferguson.net.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Alexa's Fotos at Pixabay.

References in the article:

(1) https://answersingenesis.org/,  https://www.focusonthefamily.com/culture/

(2) https://www.museumofthebible.org/k-12-programs

(3) http://upgradewithdawn.com/blog/2022/4/12/how-to-champion-your-missionaries.html

(4) http://upgradewithdawn.com/blog/2021/9/10/helping-your-children-dream.html

Who, Me? Memorize Scripture?

Sally Ferguson is wise and practical, and is so good at zooming in on biblical solutions for everyday problems. In this Scripture Memorization UPGRADE, she provides the motivation and the know-how to help us hide God's Word in our hearts.“Memorize schmemorize. Hmpf!" Sally said. "'Don’t ask me to put Scripture to memory—I can’t even remember what I had for breakfast,' said every person, ever."

Oh, I (Dawn) do think it's much harder to memorize when we're older. Then again, I've found that I'm able to focus better now that the distractions of youth are far behind—but I know not everyone finds that true. We need some tools to help us, and Sally has some good tips!

Sally continues . . .

The reasons we don’t attempt to memorize Scripture can be as varied as the types of breakfast foods on a buffet.

• “I don’t know how.”
• “My brain doesn’t function like that.”
• “I have to keep track of too many things.”

Are our brains running at full capacity? Have we tapped out what we can emotionally tackle as a human thinking machine?

Technology, change, and busy schedules all take a toll on our emotional quotient. But rest and recuperate and those mental capacities reboot for a new round.

Maybe then, there’s room for adding a few more words to our repertoire.

Three Tips for Memorizing Scripture:

1. Add Music.

Does a song on the radio remind you of where you were when first you heard it?

Music provides access to another part of the brain and opens mental doors. Sing a little ditty and make it fun.

2. Add exercise.

Carry the verse on a 3x5 card and glance at it while going through your workout.

Even while swimming laps in college, I was able to write the words on a chalkboard and glance at every turn.

Moving your body warms up your concentration and jogs your memory.

3. Subtract words.

Use a whiteout board or computer screen to erase a word as you say the verse. Continue to recite and erase. Challenge yourself to a do over.

When you are verbal with the verse, your ears get involved.

Whether you are a visual learner or auditory processor, you can learn tricks to bring Scripture to life.

Visualize the scene.
     Hear the consonants.
          Repeat.

Repetition equips the brain to be familiar with a concept and to process its implications.

Three Reasons for Memorizing Scripture

1. Jesus did.

When Jesus faced temptation in the wilderness, He said we are to live on “every word that comes from the mouth of God” (Matthew 4:4 ESV).

2. Moses did.

He told the Israelites to have the commands on their hearts, impress them on their kids, and talk about them when sitting, walking, lying down, and getting up (Deuteronomy 6:4-9).

A life dedicated to God’s Word will be saturated in God’s Word.

3. Paul did.

Paul told Timothy to be a wordsmith in order to correctly handle God’s Word (2 Timothy 2:15). What does a wordsmith do? Weigh words, test them, and become proficient in their use.

Knowing God’s Word equips us to handle it proficiently.

When you store away God’s Word, your brain cells have something to retrieve when the Holy Spirit brings it to mind.

I assigned a memory verse to my class this week and felt the same panic I viewed in their faces.

Could I beat the recent brain fog and commit Scripture to memory?

I prayed and asked the Lord for help, and the tune to Charles W. Naylor’s hymn, “Once Again We Come” began to play in my mind. Try it and see how perfect it is for our verse:

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy

        and peace as you trust in him,

    so that you may overflow with hope

        by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

 Romans 15:13 in the NIV says . . . (repeat).

The song helps the brain to remember phrases and words.

Another way to learn God’s Word is by tweeting it.

Use the current word limit of a tweet to condense the concept conveyed. It will help you grasp the message and carry it through your day. It may also equip someone else to recall what they need for encouragement at just the right moment.

If all else fails, you can do what I did today.

Write out the verse longhand and give your memory a chance to latch on.

More than typing it out, “the physical act of writing brings the information to the forefront and triggers your brain to pay close attention.” 

Yes, you can memorize Scripture with a little help from handy tools. Use the time while doing dishes or on your morning commute to commit treasures from God’s Word to memory.

You’ll gain a new confidence in your abilities and in the Lord’s power to renew your mind!

What passage will you commit to memory this week?

Sally Ferguson is a teacher of God’s Word and a student of people. Whether leading retreats or small groups, she loves to see the light shine when hope abounds. Sally lives in western New York with her husband and her dad. Her current project is a Bible study for caregivers. Catch up with her at sallyferguson.net.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Beloso & Herchen GbR at Pixabay.

Advice from a King

Sally Ferguson always encourages readers to look at the plain truth of scripture and then apply it to their lives. In this Wisdom UPGRADE, she reminds us of a famous king who knew he needed God's help as he made plans for his future. Sally says we need to turn to the Lord regarding the details of our lives too.

"The world has been watching as the monarchy changed hands in England," Sally says. "A cherished Queen passed her torch to her son."

Like much of the world, I (Dawn) watched Queen Elizabeth's memorial service. The regal celebration of her life was only overshadowed by the sadness in her family at her passing. I watched King Charles' face—incredible grief—and wondered what he was thinking. Was he overwhelmed by the role that would soon be his?

Sally continues . . .

The logistics of rulership include reminting currency, updating police uniforms, and building facades to project the King’s image and cypher. The national anthem becomes "God bless the King," and His Majesty’s preferences will take priority. At the end of an era, the Queen’s deeds are memorialized. *

Another son also rose to power when his famous father passed from this life.

King Solomon

Solomon had big sandals to fill when the baton was passed to him. I can imagine his knees quivering as he asked God for help with his new role.

“Give me wisdom and knowledge so I can lead this people, because no one can govern this great people of yours without your help” (2 Chronicles 1:10 CEB).

Had God asked me about my greatest wish, I’m not sure I would have thought to ask for wisdom.

Solomon watched his dad struggle with political egos and expansions, and knew it was beyond his comprehension. David’s rule grew with the kingdom—now it was up to his son to manage.

Some of Solomon’s quest for understanding is recorded for us in the book of Proverbs.

1. Plan away, but God saves the day.

I’m a planner down to the last detail. Sometimes plans must be set aside.

Maybe you’ve experienced this when the phone rang, and your plans changed because of an emergency at home? Or work called and needed extra hands for the task?

It happened to me this summer when my carefully composed itinerary wouldn’t print for our family reunion. Hubby said, “Let’s just go with it,” and we did.

Everything progressed for a fun boating adventure and, as far as I know, we didn’t leave anyone in the middle of the lake.

Solomon says,

“A man’s mind plans his way [as he journeys through life], But the Lord directs his steps and establishes them” (Proverbs 16:9 AMP).

Have you been orchestrating details the Lord wants to direct? What would it look like to submit them to God’s guidance?

2. Dedicated plans. Successful outcomes.

When my friend’s Multiple Sclerosis advanced, she opted to seek relief with Stem Cell Replacement Therapy. She gathered a team to help with financial planning, physical care in traveling to Chicago, and practical help at home. It was daunting.

Our prayers felt like desperation knocking on heaven’s door.

My team brainstormed options for fundraising and decided to host a Harvest Fest with vendors, raffle baskets and children’s activities.

• We got on the phone and knocked on doors.
• We prayed for the Lord to do a mighty work for His glory.
• We cheered when people donated supplies and time.
• We celebrated when the farmer volunteered his wagon and horses for a hayride, and when the church rallied around our cause.

The day was a smashing success and a miracle to watch unfold. Six years later, we still marvel at what the Lord did in our midst.

Solomon says,

“Put God in charge of your work, then what you’ve planned will take place" (Proverbs 16:3 MSG).

Do you have trust issues?

God is able to handle the details.

How can you release your desires to God's undertaking?

3. Everything is potential for God’s redemption.

Some things in life don’t feel redeemable. Romans 8:28 reminds us every detail of our lives can be worked into something good for God’s glory.

I wrote a piece for Live & Learn: Unexpected Lessons From God’s Classroom that felt very vulnerable. It laid bare the outbursts I had when my kids were little. It exposed my impatience when life got out of control. And yet it became a tool for healing to see the Lord redeem life in the learning room with God.

2 Corinthians 1:3-7 says we give better to others what we learn from our own suffering.

Proverbs 16:4 says, “The Lord has made everything for its own purpose. . . “(NASB).

If everything has a purpose, then the junk you’re going through will one day be something you’ll treasure.

What part of life leaves you feeling vulnerable? Will you surrender it to God’s safe keeping until it becomes a blessing for someone else?

Solomon’s reasons for writing Proverbs are listed in Proverbs 1:2-6. There are 31 chapters—why not study one each day of the month? You’ll never lose your place when the chapter corresponds with the date on the calendar.

My prayer for today:

Lord, align my will to do Your will and grant me a dream worthy of the pursuit. May Your Name be glorified. Amen.

What dream will you pursue with the Lord’s help?

Sally Ferguson usually has to go through the school of hard knocks to learn her lessons. She’s learning to let the Lord use her foibles to help others and bring encouragement for the journey. Her story is available in Live & Learn: Unexpected Lessons From God’s Classroom. Sally lives in western New York with her husband and her dad and is working on a Bible study for caregivers. Catch up with Sally on her on her website.

* Reference: https://www.royal.uk/his-majesty-kings-cypher

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Daniel Kirsch at Pixabay.