4 'Simplify' Tips to Sail Through December

I have long respected Marcia Ramsland for her wisdom, especially her organizational skills. In this special Saturday Holiday UPGRADE, she shares how to deal with holiday stress.
"Ever since I overcame my own overwhelming and chaotic Christmas Eve wrapping marathons years ago," Marcia says, "I've been passionate about helping people let go of the stress and enjoy the season."

When I [Dawn] read Marcia's recent newsletter about holiday stress, I was in the middle of a migraine and other physical upsets. I knew it was from a too-crowded schedule–afraid I can't get everything done. Her words, "let go," made a lot of sense.

Marcia inspired me to take a nap and contemplate how I could simplify some of my own holiday responsibilities.

As I rested, these words from Jesus encouraged me to seek Him:

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid" (John 14:27).

I don't think Jesus was talking about my Christmas schedule, but God's Spirit sure did encourage me! Later, I was ready to implement Marcia's four simplification tips.

Marcia continues . . .

 Stress? What stress?

December holds four extra activity layers that challenge your very best organization skills.

The four things that complicate our lives in December are: gift giving, decorating, cards, and extra events. But even with the added activities–not to mention the complexity (and joy) of relationships–you can enjoy the whole season!

1.  Simplify Your Gifts.

Everyone loves to recevie a gift, yet it takes making a Master Gift List of your own (or you can ours), to keep track of what you bought and spent. The same chart every year helps your memory and reminds you where to shop for each person.

2.  Simplify Your Decorations.

Remember that you store your decorations for eleven months of the year so get them up early!

And if it's all too much to put up, make someone else's holidays happy and donate some to charity. It's a Win-Win for you and them!

3.  Simplify Your Greetings.

This can be as simple as  choosing one card for everyone, computerizing your labels, or creating an email names list to send an Online Greeting. Keep in touch.

And send a photo to bring you closer to the people you love. I send a whole photo letter online and love choosing the photos from the year. Do it for others and yourself.

4.  Simplify Your Social Calendar.

Besides attending events you "have" to for work or responsibilities, choose another one or two that are new or make you feel the joy of the season. Make a memory and invite a friend or family to go with you.

December can either be the best month of the year or the most stressful.

What does it look like for you? Which of these "simplify" tips would help you sail through this month?

NOTE: For some great Holiday resources, check out Marcia's Organizing Pro Holidays link.

Marcia Ramsland is well known as the "Organizing Pro,” a national speaker, and author of over 100,000 books sold in her Simplify Your Life series. Marcia personally coaches individuals and organizations to be highly productive in managing their time, space, and life. Hundreds of clients and audiences from New York to California agree with her belief that anyone can become more organized - even YOU! Contact her at http://www.OrganizingPro.com.

Graphic adapted, Image courtesy of nuchylee at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

How to Create a Grace-Filled Christmas

Joan Webb is a Word-saturated, intentional woman of God. In this Holiday UPGRADE, she explores how practicing grace might help us during the Christian season.

 "While preparing for this gift-giving season, I asked myself—and God—two questions (at different times)," Joan said.  

"First: What is Christmas to me?

"Second: What would it mean to enjoy a grace-filled' holiday?"

This sounds like an invitation to freedom to me (Dawn). I'm going to sit at Joan's feet a few minutes and learn from her wisdom.

Joan continues ...

Regarding question #1, I wrote the following in my journal:

To me Christmas is:

1. Jesus—knowing Him intimately and learning what He meant when He said, "I came that you might have abundant life."

2. Loving God, and walking and talking with Him daily.

3. Experiencing God the Father, God the Son (Jesus Christ), and God the Spirit in the midst of earth's daily imperfection and chaos.

"Sooooo, every day is Christmas to me," I concluded.

And then it dawned on me that this reality—that every day is Christmas for me—has caused me to "lighten up" my unrealistic expectations for celebrating Christmas. It's been more an internal shift than an outward one.

I've released some of the intense "shoulds and have tos and musts" that society, the media, the church, my inner bully and others (who appear to have it all together) tell me (or at least hint) that I NEED to do. 

In my heart, I now know I don't have to cram all my giving, caring, doing, gratitude, merriment, music, celebrations, goodwill, and spirituality into the four to five concentrated weeks of Christmas holidaying.

Regarding Question #2:

I read about the original meaning of the word "grace" used in the Bible to tell us about the Christ of Christ-mas. This "grace" is the direct opposite of "works." In fact the two are mutually exclusive.

All my "trying too hard to make it all just right" at Christmas (or any other time) is the antithesis of grace.

When I truly accept God's grace (or favor) in Christ, I'm able to be grace-ful with myself and others. We can be thankful for this wonderful grace:

"The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. ... From the fullness of his grace we have all received one blessing after another. For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ" (John 1:14-17).

I shared this practical grace example with some women at the beginning of December one year. A mom with four little kids got so excited that she began thinking of ways to "grace" herself and her family during the Christmas season.

One practical thing she did was to relax her expectations for how her artificial tree would be decorated. When she put it together, she didn't have time to "fluff" up the branches, so she let it go—and allowed the kids to decorate anyway!

All very smile-able.

How will you "grace" yourself and your loved ones this Christmas season?

Joan C. Webb is a speaker and author who has written thirteen books including The Intentional Woman (co-authored with Carol Travilla), The Relief of Imperfection: For Women Who Try Too Hard to Make It Just Right and a four book devotional series for children. As a Life Coach who specializes in working with writers and communicators, Joan helps set people free to become who they were designed to be and from what holds them back. For more information about becoming an intentional woman, visit Joan's website.

Help Children Think Outside Themselves

Have you ever fallen for the slogan, “Because you’re worth it”? In today’s Parenting UPGRADE, Moms Inc. ministry founder, Holly Hanson, shares her insights on raising kids who see the value in considering others more important than themselves.

“It’s easy to live in this world and believe the lies that everything should be all about you!” Holly says.     

I (Dawn) see this message ("You're worth it ... You deserve this!") everywhere, and Holly explains it’s pretty hard to fight, especially for the younger generation. Although selfless living is important all year long, the holidays are a good time to help children focus on others. Holly recently shared with me the tools she is using to help her young daughter develop eyes that see beyond herself.

Holly continues …

We began developing this character trait of looking for opportunities to share when Angela was quite small.

I can remember lots of times when we would go to an event, intentionally bringing an extra parking pass, meal voucher, or entry ticket, just for the enjoyment letting her find a family who was in need and blessing them with it. 

The big payoff came on Halloween this year. We headed to the pumpkin patch with two of her fifth grade friends and a few train ride tickets they planned to use. We had two spare tickets, and I asked Angela and her buddies if they would like to scope out a family with children and make their night a little brighter. I waited in line while they went off to do the job.

Angela quickly ran back and said, “Mom, I’m going to give my ticket away. The family we picked has three kids, and we need one more so they can all go together. I just won’t ride this time.”

It was at that moment I thanked God for a glittering glimpse of selflessness in the heart of my 10-year-old daughter. (Angela is in the center of the photo, above.)

Looking beyond yourself is a lifestyle practice. The more you do it, the easier it gets.

In several Bible passages, we are encouraged to selflessly think of others.

Matthew 25:40 says, “The king will reply, ‘Whatever you did for the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me’.”

In Romans 12:10, Paul says, “Be devoted to one another with mutual love, showing eagerness in honoring one another.”

Eagerness. I think that’s the true key.

When we actively look for opportunities to see beyond ourselves, the possibilities are endless.

Here are some ways to encourage selflessness: 

1. Encourage your child to invite a shy student to his or her birthday party.
2. Find a homeless person who spends time near your home or work or school. Work with your children to think of safe ways to bless that person and regularly encourage them.
3. Fill a shoebox for Operation Christmas Child or buy a gift for an Angel Tree family this Christmas. Help your kids (or grandkids) imagine what those children would love to receive.
4. Encourage your child to find a new friend each year when school starts or on the first day of camp - and show them “the ropes”. I recently was told that this made all the difference for a little girl Angela met this summer.
5. Model the practice of giving up your seat, letting others in line ahead of you, and helping an elderly person (or a mom wrangling kids) with the door, if you see a need.
6. Find a friend’s monetary or material need and simply meet it. Host a fundraiser, get a donation, or do a garage sale.
7. Establish a regular prayer list for people in your circle of influence who are hurting or need intercession. Encourage your children to make their own list. This is critical in teaching them that they have the power to ask God for big things on behalf of others.

Also, create ways to incorporate a “purpose” into events you host at your house.

One year we created a “water science” birthday party and used experiments to teach the kids about clean water. Instead of bringing birthday gifts, we asked our guests to bring between $5 and $10 to be contributed toward a well-drilling project through World Help.

My friends told me their kids came home talking all about it, with empathy for others they didn’t have before.

It’s these small foundational steps that help us reap the rewards of putting others ahead of ourselves.

Nobody ever became a worse person because they cared about others.

Which of the seven steps above can you do right away to encourage selfless living in your own family?

Holly Hanson is a veteran Emmy Award-winning journalist who finds her calling in her family motto: “Love God, Serve Others.” Holly has written and produced internationally for Women of Faith, Turning Point Ministries, and locally with KFMB-TV, KFMB-AM and KPBS Radio. She is married and is a mom, step-mom and grandma. Holly is active at Shadow Mountain Community Church, serving on the Women's Ministries Council, singing in the choir, and running Moms Inc., a ministry she founded and directs. 

21 Ways to Thrive through the Holidays

Poppy Smith’s personal blog banner reads “Inspiring YOU to Thrive!” I thought she’d be the perfect one to help us thrive all December long in this Holiday UPGRADE.

“We’ve all heard flight attendants instruct passengers to put their oxygen masks on first before helping others in an emergency,” Poppy said.

“Well, if we want to thrive rather than barely survive under the added pressures of the Christmas season, and if we want to shine with God’s love and joy rather than be grumpy and upset, we need to follow the same advice.”

I (Dawn) don't know about you, but I always end up exhausted by December 31st, and it's not just about being organized and prepared—because I am. So I was looking for some suggestions to make this year different.

Poppy continues …

Pay regular attention to your own physical, spiritual, and emotional needs. By doing this, you’ll avoid blow-ups and melt-downs that come from too much stress and low blood sugar, and instead, have what it takes to thrive and bless others.

In announcing Christ’s birth, an angel of the Lord said, “I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people” Luke 2:10. Christmas is a time for joy, smiles and delight in all God’s blessings.

Here are 21 ways that can help make this happen!

THRIVE by Doing What Gives You JOY! (Say "Yes!")

1. Do you love a Christmas concert? Check out what’s available and invite someone to go with you.

2. Take your children, grandchildren, or other little ones to a Nativity display with live animals.

3. Treat an older friend or relative to a special Christmas tea or lunch.

4. Go with a friend (or spouse, if willing) to a new, fun part of town to see the Christmas displays.

THRIVE by Saying "NO" to:

5. Too many events—choose one or two and enjoy others next year

6. Too many invitations—decline graciously by declaring you’re already tied up (you are—at home!)

7. Too much food, drink—eat before you go so you’re half-full. Taste everything. Then drink water!

8. Too much debt— decide NOW how much you’ll spend overall, and on each person.  Shop sales!

9. Spending too much time doing things to please others (or win their approval or admiration.)

THRIVE by Eliminating Pressure:

10. Hosting an event? Invite others to bring a treat or dish to share—don’t do it all!

11. Organizing your extended-family gift-giving? Suggest giving to one person, not ten!

12. Check your card or Christmas letter list. Send greetings to people who truly matter to you.

13. Give yourself permission to quit a tradition if you have no time or energy.

THRIVE by Taking Time For Yourself:

14. Take a long, hot, bubble-bath by candle light accompanied by your favorite music.

15. Go for a slow walk admiring the Christmas lights and twinkling trees in the windows.

16. Sing or play Christmas carols that celebrate the gift of God, His Son Jesus.

17. Sit by your tree, enjoy scented candles, and read the Word for an hour.

THRIVE by Focusing On Jesus:

18. Read the Christmas story to yourself or a child. Make it come alive. Be in awe.

19. Spend time writing down all the blessings you have because Jesus came.

20. Sing—by yourself, or with others. Raise your voices. Rejoice in His love.

21. Encourage children to act out the Christmas story and help them dress the part in creative costumes. Have fun with them so that they experience the wonder of that first Christ-filled day.

Make JOY your goal this holiday season.

Decide what’s important and what you want to say YES to. And, just as important, choose what you’ll say NO to. 

If you ask God for guidance and make some new decisions, YOU WILL THRIVE through the holidays!

Which of Poppy's 21 THRIVE suggestions are already working for you? Is there a suggestion you want to try?

Poppy Smith is British, married to an American, and has lived in many countries. A former Bible Study Fellowship teaching leader with a Masters in Spiritual Formation, she is a multi-published author who speaks widely, challenging women to make their lives count by looking at their choices, attitudes, and relationship with God. For more about Poppy and her helpful resources, including her book, I'm Too Human to Be Like Jesus: Spiritual Growth for the Not-So-Perfect Woman, visit her website.

Graphic adapted, Image courtesy of scottchan at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Just a Little Bit More

In this affluent society, we're always trying to add just a little bit more to our lives. More wealth. More stuff. More prestige. In this Thanksgiving Upgrade, Dawn Wilson encourages us to add a bit more gratitude.

Last summer, Sharon Jaynes wrote about I Thessalonians 5:18: Give thanks in all circumstances. "We read that verse and think it rather nice," Sharon wrote, "So we slap a sloppy coat of thanksgiving on life and go about our day. In reality, most of us are thankful for very little."

Instead of expressing gratitude, we complain. A lot.

I focused on not complaining this summer for one whole week. I didn't think I was a natural complainer. I've since discovered everyone is. It's that nasty sin nature rearing it's head.

That's why Paul instructs, "Do all things without murmurings (complaining) and disputings" (Philippians 2:14). Complaining devastated the the Israelites (Exodus 16:8; Numbers 11:1-4; Psalm 106:25; 1 Corinthians 10:10).

Complaining has many negative consequences. It messes up our relationships and conversations. It focuses on the negative, sees the worst, darkens our spirit and zaps our energy. Complaining increases stress; we just can't seem to "release" our grumbling. Even when we complain just to ourselves, we are essentially making excuses for our lack of gratitude.

So I'll admit it. I struggled with that week of "not complaining." I was surprised how many complaints entered my mind in such a short period.

I found it extremely difficult to stop complaining. Until I started thanking.

Thanksgiving made the difference. I was allowing God to transform my thinking (Romans 12:2).

Gratitude is a choice, and it can root out an ungrateful, murmuring, complaining spirit. We're not commanded in scripture to feel more grateful, but we are instructed to be thankful.

"Gratitude changes the lens through which we see circumstances in our little slice of time," Sharon said. "Thanksgiving changes our perspective despite broken dreams, broken relationships, tumultuous circumstances and unfulfilled longings."

Repeatedly in the Psalms, we observe David move from a place of depression or sharing his complaints with God to a better place. His perspective seems to change as he praises God or expresses gratitude:  

In Psalm 57, David complains that his soul "is in the midst of lions" (v. 4). His enemies are trying to destroy him. He's in pretty bad shape, emotionally.

Yet in verses 9-11, what a turnaround!

"I will give thanks to you, O Lord, among the peoples; I will sing praises to you among the nations. For your steadfast love is great to the heavens, your faithfulness to the clouds. Be exalted, O God, above the heavens! Let your glory be over all the earth!"

We see this same turnaround in Psalm 42:10-11 and Psalm 62:3-7. David consistently moved from grumbling and all sorts of negative emotions to praise and gratitude.  

He chose a different perspective and got a different result. And in that change of attitude, God was honored and glorified.

Another thing I discovered in my week of no complaining. Even a little bit of gratitude makes a difference.

Like a stream of light through an opening door, gratitude diffuses the darkness of our grumbling.

It's not slapping on "a sloppy coat of thanksgiving." It's getting honest with God about our needs, and then stopping to recognize God in the midst of our circumstances. To praise Him. To thank Him.

Think about the complaints you've made even this week. Can you add a bit more gratitude? Will you choose to thank God in your situation, even if you don't feel thankful?

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Ministries, is the creator of three blogs: Heart Choices Today, LOL with God (with Pam Farrel), and Upgrade with Dawn. She is the President of the San Diego chapter of Network of Evangelical Women in MInistry (NEWIM San Diego). Dawn is the co-author of LOL with God and contributed "The Blessing Basket" in It's a God Thing. She and her husband Bob have two grown, married sons, three granddaughters and a rascally maltipoo, Roscoe.