How to Spread a 'Sweet Aroma'

Mary James communicates messages from the heart in her music and her writing, and in this Spiritual Life UPGRADE she invites us to think about the “scent” of our lives.

“We absorb what we are exposed to, in ways that we cannot always see,” Mary said. “For a Christ follower, the value of others’ influence should never be taken for granted—especially while the world around them is continually sending out the message, ‘anything goes.’”  

I (Dawn) am influenced by so many people and things in our culture, as are you. Sometimes we aren’t even aware of their input. Maybe it’s time we pause to think: What or who does my life, my behavior, my attitudes, reflect?

Mary continues . . .

“What is that smell?” I asked was we picked up our six-year old Pekingese from Grandma’s house recently.

Because the odor resembled burning rubber, my dear mother replied, “Maybe there was an issue with the vacuum belt. It has given us trouble before.” 

Uh, no. Isaiah had in-fact had one of those infamous “skunk encounters.” 

Fortunately, it was not a direct hit, so my husband and I were able to tolerate the aroma for the duration of our 75-minute drive home. Well, almost. 

With windows rolled down and a lengthy debate over how our furry child could have possible been hit, we stopped at the grocery story to pick up a few needed items: Dawn dishwashing soap and tomato juice.

As I checked out, the clerks began commenting on a strange odor.

The first said, “Something smells like burning rubber.”

The second quickly chimed in, “It smells like skunk to me!” 

My stomach sank, but I had to laugh and then tell them our dog had just been sprayed.

I was completely unaware his aroma had rubbed off on me.

A few days later, the music of one of my favorite artists kept playing in my head. I finally dug out the CDs and listened once more to her incredible gift. She is one of the most artistic and thought-provoking singer-songwriters I have ever heard; yet the more I listened, the more sad and uneasy I became.   

With 100 items on my “to do” list, I stayed busy as the music played. But once I slowed down and focused on her words, I understood what was impacting my mood.

The lyrics were without hope and held a distorted worldview when it came to Jesus.

If there were references to God or Christ, they came as doubt-filled, rebellious undertones, or words of blatant discontent with God. 

Despite my spiritual maturity, her attitude had subtly rubbed-off on me to the point where my joy was drowned out by her faithless lyrics and sorrow-filled melodies.  

Why did I even open that can of worms? Good question. I had enjoyed her music for so long, I thought it would be harmless to listen again. Harmless. 

These two experiences are a valuable reminder of guarding the heart.

We absorb what we are exposed to in ways we cannot always see.  Who and what we hang around matters. 

No wonder Jesus (Mark 9:42-50) and Paul (Romans 14:13-23) warned us not to do anything that will cause another person to stumble. If you grumble enough, gossip enough, overeat, drink, smoke or cuss around those you are in relationship with, your “aroma” can subtly become theirs (or vice versa).   

For a Christ follower, the value of others’ influence should never be taken for granted, especially while the world around them is continually sending out the message, “anything goes.”   

I admit, this seems like a daunting charge, but all who understand God’s grace know that it is by His Spirit their steps are guided. 

God also created this amazing thing called “fellowship” where Christians can act as iron (or sharpeners) in each other’s lives. If someone has a bad attitude, speaking God’s truth over each other’s skunk-ed-ness, praying, lovingly suggesting a “spiritual shower” or simply turning off bad music can truly be medicine for the heart. 

This amazing transformative stuff that happens on the inside is what shows up on the outside, causing us to be pleasing aromas to God and those around us. Just think how anger on the inside shows up on the outside, or how discontentment on the inside shows up in your shopping cart. 

I don’t know about you, but when I leave a room I certainly want the smell that lingers—the words that I deposit into hearts and minds—to be sweet; words that strengthen hearts, not weaken them.  

Let’s always remember and respond to life with this truth in mind: “For we are to God the pleasing aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing” (2 Corinthians 2:15).

Has the smell of something not so pleasant rubbed off on you? Is there any music playing in your life that needs to be turned off?

Mary James, living out the charge found in 1 Peter 2:9 that we are “Saved to proclaim the excellence of Him who called us out of darkness into His marvelous light,” uses  music and transparent, biblically-centered messages to tear down walls and point people to Jesus. Since entering ministry in 2000, Mary has released five full-length CDs and shared the platform with Dr. David Jeremiah, Kay Arthur, Sheila Walsh, Greg Laurie, Bob Goff, Kirk Cameron and many others. She is a three-time Inspirational Country Music Female Vocalist of the Year Award winner and two-time ICM Music Evangelist of the Year Nominee.

Graphic adapted, Image courtesy of fotographic1980 at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Finding the Fruit in Your Failures

Mary James’ ministry is a combination of strength and vulnerability. In this Spiritual Growth UPGRADE, she helps us deal with the “failures” in our lives from a godly perspective.

 “Perfect love casts out all fear,” Mary says, “but it is only God’s love that is truly perfect.”

Do you struggle with feelings of failure, believing the enemy’s lies? I (Dawn) rejoice in the truth: I am“accepted in the beloved” (Ephesians 1:6) and the Father receives me in Christ with perfect love.

Mary continues . . .

I’ve worked hard at my craft over the years, but those moments still come along that make me want to cringe: a slightly pitchy note, misspelled word, bad wardrobe choice, an incomplete thought or point.

This is completely normal, but it seems like the biggest bloopers occur when I am in front of the largest crowds. Anyone else? I suppose that is why public speaking and singing is such a huge fear for most people. It comes with great risk to the ego. 

I had an experience recently where “it” happened again…the blooper…well, bloopers actually. 

If it was “American Idol,” it would have been my final week.

Every ounce of me wanted to deliver my songs with the utmost of excellence, but it just didn't happen. From my perspective, I let the people down who trusted me with the task.  

Can any good come out of the moments in our lives or careers when we feel like nothing more than a failure? I believe so, if we are willing to wait on God before deciding we have run our last race.     

Over the last 15 years of ministry, there have been times when I over promised and under delivered—and vice versa. Each experience provided an opportunity to learn from the One who made my appointments in the first place. 

The internal and external critics can be deafening, but God always has the final say. 

It’s probably a little different for everyone, but there are several valuable truths that have helped me rise above the inner critic and the competitive nature of society.   

1. Take responsibility.

No one has more skin in the game than you do, so ultimately you must take full responsibility for your own growth or professional development. Whether it’s a blog, a book or a performance that falls flat, the question should always be, “What can I do to improve my craft when the next assignment comes along?”  

The comforting part is, if what you are engaged in is God’s will for your life, there will be another assignment. Watch, listen, and critique your efforts so you can become the best edition of yourself you can be. 

2. Ask, “Is my name on it?”

Though I “bloopered” that public performance and understand how to do a better job next time, it was not exactly in line with my ministry passion. Yet by walking through that door, I was able to see (once again) that not everything is a fit. And that is OK.  

I heard Christine Caine say recently, “I’ve reached a point where I don’t want to do anything that doesn’t have my name on it.” How true it is. This is where I need to be comfortable saying “no” from time to time.

3. Keep your eyes upon the Father. 

As I went forward to sing for the final time at the event—while blushing and fearful of messing up again—I suddenly got this picture of my heavenly Father calling me over to Him and saying,

"Mary, come near. Sit on my knee and please sing me that lovely song once more. I love to hear that voice I gave you." 

It occurred to me, perfect love casts out all fear (1 John 4:18), but it is only His love that is truly perfect.  

If I take my eyes off the Lord and look to others for approval, it’s astonishing how quickly I can enter a place of fear. It is no surprise how quickly one can sink.

To the Lord, my song was sweet and imperfect and beautiful.

Within my error and anxiety, He showed me what perfect love looks like.

No experience or endeavor is one dimensional. There is much to be given, learned and received at every opportunity.

We need to grow, seek excellence, and make choices that align with our giftings, but I will say this: after 15 years of working hard, honing my craft, struggling with confidence and praying that God would bring forth a harvest from my branches, the gift (understanding) I received through that picture (visual) of me of sitting on my Father’s knee—singing to Him—is what I would deem the greatest of successes. Nothing earned, just a gentle and victorious reminder of His grace and unmerited favor.   

It’s a profound truth that if practiced will allow me to take a deep breath and simply enjoy the music.

Remember, well-formed love—God’s love—will cast out all our fears.

The fruit of our labor is not always found in how we impact others, but in how God is growing us so that we can most effectively draw others to His knee.

Failures, though never welcome, can be the very thing God uses to remind us of what matters most to Him.   

Have you taken your eyes off of Him Beloved? I trust He is waiting to hear your beautiful song as well.

Mary James is a Christian Artist, Worship Leader, speaker and writer. Through her soul-stirring music, adoption-prodigal story and transparent, biblically-centered messages, Mary is devoted to helping the broken find love, healing and abundant life through Christ. Since entering ministry, she has appeared at events with leading Bible teachers such as Dr. David Jeremiah, Kay Arthur, Sheila Walsh, Shannon Ethridge and many others. She has been recognized on a national level as a three-time Inspirational Country Music Female Vocalist of the Year and is the President of Mary James Ministries, Inc.    

Graphic, adapted from StockSnap.io.

I Choose Grace

Those who know Mary James will testify to the sweetness of her spirit and the power in her songs. I asked Mary to share an UPGRADE Uplift to encourage our hearts.

“If you believe change is not possible when looking at a situation,” Mary says, “you are deciding what God’s grace is capable of achieving.”

So many times, I (Dawn) have allowed the enemy to weigh me down with regrets. When I do that, I can’t move forward. But God does not leave us without hope.

Mary continues…..

The message of God’s grace through Christ is the most beautiful gift any of us can ever possess—especially for those who have made significant mistakes along the way.

Though we may have regrets, the weight of God’s forgiveness covers our choices with a love so big that the past loses it power over us. 

I recently heard a message that sadly left listeners without this hope. Its focus was on parenting. In a nutshell, the message said, “If you do not do as Scripture instructs, you will have regrets.” 

Ok, makes sense. We know that Scripture has been given to us for a reason and will spare us much heartache. But all of us have fallen short of its expectations.

So then what?  Oh, yes . . . a heart full of regret.

As a person who the enemy loves to torment with the past, I began to squirm in my seat.  Occasionally, I squeezed my husband’s leg in almost uncontainable frustration. 

The message continued and my spirit grew heavier and heavier, especially for the men in the auditorium who were being held to the highest level of accountability.  Yet I remained hopeful and kept waiting for it . . . and waiting . . . and waiting.  

But it never came. 

There was plenty of truth, but no grace. Not a shred.

As my husband and I sat there—two people who have made a thousand mistakes as parents—we were left to see ourselves as only one thing: failures.     

Years ago, I heard Bunnie Wilson share about the remorse she had in raising her children. Her regret was that she had not taught them to have a servant's heart. But—and there was a but—she pointed us all to a new day, a new beginning, a Christ-centered resolve. 

Bunnie said that now, every time she is with her children, she models servanthood for them. What she did not teach them when they were young, she taught them as adults.

And they were changed by her efforts. 

Every parent in the room who had missed the boat in some aspect of parenting left with that hope.  I have never forgotten her reminder of God’s ability to redeem our less than perfect choices.    

If you believe change is not possible when looking at a situation, you are deciding what God’s grace is capable of achieving.

God has given us history so that we that we can learn from it, but Paul also understood the danger of living in the past.

As he wrote in Philippians 3:12-14,

“Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”

We can live in the bondage of regret, or we can let the power of God’s grace move us into a new day. Either way it requires effort.

Regret is like carrying around that proverbial baggage, where grace requires humility: placing any limitations, grudges or shame into the hands of God.

Whether we are at the podium or in the pews, rigidity in our thinking when it comes to God’s ability to change us or restore a relationship/situation, diffuses the work of the cross. 

Oddly, our regrets can be the very things that help us understand our need for Jesus.

We must accept consequences, but God has shown us time and time again that He can take a mess and turn it into a masterpiece.  

Which do you choose? The mess or the masterpiece? Regret or grace? 

 Mary James is a Christian Artist and Speaker who has embraced the charge found in 1 Peter 2:9, that we are, “Saved to Proclaim the excellence of Him who called us out of darkness into His marvelous light.” Through her music, testimony of grace, and transparent, biblically-centered messages, Mary is devoted seeing hearts and lives healed, strengthened and transformed by Christ. Since entering ministry in 2000, she has released five full-length CDs, shared the platform with leading Bible teachers such as Dr. David Jeremiah and Kay Arthur, and is a three-time Inspirational Country Music Female Vocalist of the Year Award winner. Visit Mary's Website.

Graphic in post adapted, Image courtesy of marin at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.