Virtual Hugs and Vertical Help

With the explosion of social media, there are countless opportunities to encourage our friends and family. In this Spiritual Life UPGRADE, Dawn Wilson shares two: Virtual Hugs and Vertical Help.

While it's better to spend some face-time with our friends and family, don't discount the value of encouraging Facebook-time!

It's my goal to encourage someone every day in some way. That's hard to do when I spend most of my time at my computer with work, blog management and personal writing.

But here are two ways anyone can be an encourager on social media.

1. Virtual Hugs

The word "virtual," as it is related to computers, means not physically existing as such, but made to appear to be true. A virtual hug is a practical social media way to encourage others.

I hear about a hurting friend or family member and I want to rush to their side and offer a huge hug and word of encouragement. But we are often miles apart—even states away or around the world!

I can certainly pick up a telephone and call them, or shoot them a quick text; but for ongoing encouragement, I can offer a "virtual hug" often and in a number of ways online:

• I can empathize, seeking to understand and share in others' feelings.
• I can share an encouraging quotation, maybe in a specially-created meme.
• I can ask questions to help people process and come to wise conclusions.
• I can offer a scripture—by text or meme—that speaks hope into their situation.
• I can post an article that might encourage or challenge for guidance or growth.
• (And sometimes, I can set up an appointment to "do lunch" or meet somewhere for an actual hug, because there are times face-to-face is the only way to go.)

While my motives and efforts are good, I know virtual hugs can only go so far. I might not understand the real or deepest needs. So . . .

I invite the Lord into the encouragement process.

2. Vertical Help

I've learned to turn my thoughts and conversations into prayers for my friends and family. I especially do so to enlist the Lord's help in sticky, tough and seemingly-impossible situations.

We can do much to help others "horizontally," but we also need to seek aid "vertically" too.

In other words:

Our help and encouragement can be good, but God's help is always better.

We might have an agenda to our prayers, but the Lord most certainly has purposes beyond us. His thoughts and ways are so unlike ours (Isaiah 55:8). It's always wise to seek His will as we pray for ourselves and others.

More than an "I'm praying for you" or an even quicker "Praying" (although there is nothing wrong with those responses), I especially love to pause a little longer and actually write my prayer to the Lord on Facebook so my friend can join in.

As my prayers fly upward to the Lord for my Facebook friends, I picture God's help flowing down to encourage, assist, and even transform.

• The Lord is our refuge and strength—a safe place for us—and He is ready to help whenever we need Him (Psalm 46:1; Hebrews 13:6);
• He understands what we're going through (Hebrews 4:15);
• and when we trust Him completely, seeking His purposes, He stands ready to guide us (Hebrews 4:16; Proverbs 3:5-6).

It's a privilege to pray for our friends and family members with these truths and promises in mind.

How are you combining virtual hugs and vertical help to encourage and support your friends and family?

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Today, is a speaker and author, and the creator of three blogs: Heart Choices Today, LOL with God (with Pam Farrel), and Upgrade with Dawn. She is a contracted researcher/reviewer for Revive Our Hearts and a writer at Crosswalk.com. She and her husband Bob live in Southern California and have two grown, married sons, three granddaughters and a rascally maltipoo, Roscoe.      

4 Ways to Turn Intentions into God-honoring Action

In this Spiritual Life UPGRADE, Dawn Wilson encourages action! Intentions are great, but they don't change the world.

"You can't build a reputation," Henry Ford said, "on what you are going to do."

That's not just true of a reputation; it's also true of anything important to us.

Whether it's in ministry, writing, a professional career, marriage, parenting, finances—whatever—intentions are only a starting point, not a means to build anything lasting or worthwhile.

Don't get me wrong. Plans and intentions are wonderful. They're necessary for success. But plans are, in and of themselves, fruitless. We have to move beyond intentions to action. 

Words are important, but ultimately, our lives are measured by what we do, not what we say.

So how do we turn our good intentions into actions that please the Lord?

I would suggest FOUR STEPS.

1. Examine Your Intentions

Good intentions aren't always good. Sometimes good intentions can be used to justify sin.

I laughed at a cartoon of a burglar before a judge. He told the judge, "Yes, I robbed the bank, but I had the best of intentions."

We see this justification of intentions in the life of Paul as he, thinking himself righteous, persecuted the church (Acts 23:1; 26:11-12). We also see misused intentions in the life of King Herod. He thought he was doing the Jews a favor—he had good political intentions—but he ended up imprisoning Peter (Acts 12:1-4). As Christians, we must examine our intentions before we move ahead.

Be sure your foundation for intentions is solid and biblical.

2. Count the Cost.

Jesus counseled His followers to "count the cost" before moving forward in a big project (Luke 14:28-30). On the surface, it appears He advocates careful decision-making.

But His counsel goes beyond our decisions to our discipleship. Masses of people followed the Lord for many reasons: free food, the miraculous healings and other miracles. But Jesus knew their hearts.

His counsel about counting the cost is part of a larger passage (14:26-33) that laid out what it meant to be His follower. While eternal life is free, discipleship "costs" us something.

It means recognizing He is Lord, and transfering the ownership of our lives and all we have to Him.

This changes the concept of our "intentions," doesn't it? "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps" (Proverbs 16:9).

Surrender every good intention to the Lord and His plans.

3. Fight the Flesh

I recently read an article that addressed humans' "internal guidance system," claiming we have "two brains: primitive and intellectual." The primitive brain or guidance system, the author suggested, was not evolved and it worked against our intellectual brain. So, accordingly, we know what to do, but our actions don't always synchronize with our intentions, because sometimes we are controlled by the primitive brain.

I smiled, suddenly "hearing" Paul's words in Romans 7:19: "For I do not do the good I want to do. Instead, I keep on doing the evil I do not want to do."

Rather than a "primitive brain" and an evolved "intellectual brain," I think we are really battling sinful flesh. It is the sinful nature we inherited from Adam (Romans 5:12; 7:14-24; Psalm 51:5). With deceitful hearts, we struggle with the "deeds of the flesh" (Jeremiah 17:9; Galatians 5:19-21).

There are consequences to our sinfulness. One of the consequences is, the flesh can really sidetrack us in our best intentions!

Through God's grace and walking in the Spirit, we can overcome the flesh (Galatians 2:20; Romans 6:11; Galatians 5:16; Romans 13:14; Psalm 119:11).

We can starve out it's influences in our lives (1 Timothy 6:11; 1 Corinthians 9:27; Colossians 3:5; Galatians 5:24; Romans 6:6).

Fight the flesh to give your good intentions a fighting chance!

4. Check Your Obedience.

Many times we are sincere about our intentions, but we don't follow through.

At the Bema Seat of Christ, it will be our obedience that stands strong in the face of judgment—our good works after salvation, not our intentions (Romans 14:10-12; 2 Corinthians 5:10).

I have often heard this passage preached:

"Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven" (Matthew 7:21)

We can have lots good intentions as Christians, but if we are not obedient disciples, committed to honoring God with righteous thoughts and behavior, we will not be seen as one who has borne fruit for the Kingdom. We will, in fact, suffer loss (1 Corinthians 3:9-15).

One of the deceiving things about intentions is they can tempt us to rest in a false sense of confidence and security. Sometimes we think because we have already "decided" to do something, we're moving forward.

Deciding is not doing.

In the parable of the two sons (Matthew 21:28-31a), Jesus taught about intentions versus obedience. When a father asked his first son to work in the vineyard, he refused, but later thought better and obeyed. When he asked the same question of the second son, the son said, "Sure, I'll go"—but he didn't follow through. He didn't obey.

The first son did the will of his father because he acted in response to the Father's will.

Many of us have heard clear instructions from our heavenly Father—perhaps during a time of prayer or Bible study, at church or in another gathering. Our hearts were moved. We may have intended to obey, but have we?

Determine to follow through on wise, biblical intentions... obey the Lord!

Good intentions, like New Year's resolutions, are only as good as the results.

In summary:

1. Be sure your foundation for intentions is solid and biblical.
2. Surrender every good intention to the Lord and His plans.
3. Fight the flesh to give your good intentions a fighting chance.
4. Determine to follow through on wise, biblical intentions ... obey the Lord!

We will not be perfect in our follow-through. We are still sinners. But sinners saved by God's transforming grace have the empowering Spirit to help us fight our battles and obey the Father.

The blessing to my heart is a wonderful truth: Our heavenly Father is "the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness"  (Exodus 34:6). When I am not faithful to my Lord, He is still faithful to me (Romans 3:3; 1 Corinthians 1:9; 2 Thessalonians 3:3; Hebrews 10:23).

God sees the believer's heart and know every intention; and He is a compassionate and faithful Father. 

What are some good intentions you have that you have yet to act upon? Would any of these points help you follow through?

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Today, is a speaker and author, and the creator of three blogs: Heart Choices Today, LOL with God (with Pam Farrel), and Upgrade with Dawn. She is a contracted researcher/reviewer for Revive Our Hearts and a writer at Crosswalk.com. She and her husband Bob live in Southern California and have two grown, married sons, three granddaughters and a rascally maltipoo, Roscoe.

Really ... the "Elf" Made Me Do It!

In this Christmas UPGRADE, Dawn reminds us to make wise, proactive choices—even at Christmastime!

My Christmas "Elf on a Shelf," Ella Noelle, is responsible for all the things going wrong in my life this Christmas.

She's responsible for:

• My cookies that burned.
• My nearly-empty wallet.
• My 2-1/2 pound weight gain.
• My overbooked calendar.
• My angry outburst at the guy that cut me off on the way to the mall and my impatience waiting in a 40-minute line because I waited too late to shop.

Yeah, right.

I can say Ella Noelle is responsible all I want, but it doesn't make it so.

It's sort of like "The devil made me do it." 

No. The devil may tempt us, but he can't force us to sin.

I remember when comedian Flip Wilson (no relation) made that remark famous in the early 1970s. For some time after, many of my friends used that as their excuse for foul-ups.

I remembered my childhood imaginary friend, Stinky Sam. Whenever I was caught in a sinful act, I'd tell myself, "That was Stinky Sam"—while I'd stand there looking totally (and adorably) innocent, sometimes holding the evidence of my "crime."

I think with some Christian maturity, I've finally outgrown those silly blame-game episodes. I've put the childish ways of blaming others behind me (1 Corinthians 13:11). I've taken more responsibility for my foolish choices.

Until I haven't.

Just yesterday, I caught myself blaming the devil after I took the third Christmas cookie.

I asked my husband, "Who emptied my wallet?" (after a trip to the mall).

I couldn't believe it was ME who uttered those nasty, impatient words at the store clerk.

The truth is, I still have to learn a lot about "owning up" when I blow it.

We're all responsible for our own ugly stuff.

The scriptures teach us the concept of personal responsiblity (see Ezekiel 18:20). Both negatively and positively, we all will reap what we sow (Galatians 6:7-8; Isaiah 3:10-11).

Here are biblical examples of some who tried to dodge responsibility when they sinned:

• Adam and Eve tried the blame game, but God confronted them about their sin (Genesis 3:12-13).
• Cain tried to cover up his sin, but God found him out (Genesis 4:9).
• Jonah tried to duck out of his disobedience, but he still had to answer to God (Jonah 1:7-8).
• Achan was responsible for his hidden sin at the city of Jericho (Joshua 7:14-15).
• David finally had to "fess up" to his sin—and he recognize who he had ultimately sinned against! (Psalm 51:4).
• Pontius Pilate said he was innocent and blamed the Jews for Jesus' crucifixion, but God saw his heart (Matthew 27:24).

God's word of warning to us is: "Be sure your sin will find you out!" (Numbers 32:23). God sees and knows. We are without excuse (Romans 1:20).

He takes note of even our secret sins  (Psalm 139:1-4, 11-12, 23-24; Psalm 69:5; 90:8; Jeremiah 16:17-18). But He can help us turn from those sins hidden in our hearts (Psalm 19:12).

Today, I praise the Lord because He has a solution for our sin.

The great gift of Christmas is God reaching down to man with abundant grace.

In great love and mercy, when we confess, our faithful Father forgives (1 John 1:9; Proverbs 28:13).

The biggest responsibility we have is to repent, believe the Gospel and live for Christ—making the wise and godly choices that please Him (Mark 1:15; 1 John 4:9-10).

We can't blame anyone but ourselves if we fail to do that: not the Elf, the devil, or even Stinky Sam!

Are you blaming others or trying to cover up your sin? How can embracing the great truth of 1 John 1:9 encourage you to come clean before the Lord and move forward in freedom?

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Today, is a speaker and author, and the creator of three blogs: Heart Choices Today, LOL with God (with Pam Farrel), and Upgrade with Dawn. She is a contracted researcher/reviewer for Revive Our Heartsand a writer at Crosswalk.com. She and her husband Bob live in Southern California and have two grown, married sons, three granddaughters and a rascally maltipoo, Roscoe.

Created for Christmas Joy

In this Christmas UPGRADE, Dawn Wilson answers the criticism that Christians make too much of Christmas.

Some Christians are almost apologetic about enjoying Christmas, but they shouldn’t be afraid to enjoy this special celebration.

Christians were created for Christmas joy!

Yes, it’s easy to get caught up in the festivities, shopping for gifts, and all the activities that layer stresses and smiles into one jumble of emotions.

There’s no question all the holiday hoopla can be fun, but the Christian’s truest joy is found in Christ, not in Christmas. Joy is based on who Jesus is and what He has done.

Still . . .

I love the wonder of Christmas I see reflected in the faces of young children; but the wonder of Christmas is not just for children.

Adults must never forget the wonder and joy that came on Jesus’ birthday. It’s not something we should ever get used to.

Think of the spectacle of that first Christmas that brought such “great joy” (Luke 2:10, 18).

In God’s timing, the Christ-child—the promised and long-awaited Messiah—broke into history.

John said the Word “became flesh” (John 1:14); Luke said our “Savior” and “Lord” was born (Luke 2:11); and Matthew described Jesus as Immanuel, "God with us” (Matthew 1:23).

At Jesus’ birth, the Father remembered us with love and grace. Peter says Jesus came to rescue us and “bring us to God” (1 Peter 3:18). The joy of Christmas includes a message of reconciliation!

Consider how that miraculous night changed everything. God did not forget His people. God kept His promises.

What a wonder!

In a riches-to-rags story of love and sacrifice, Jesus came to be a servant, and to seek and save the lost” (Matthew 20:28; 1:21; Luke 19:10). Don’t water that down. Don’t get so used to the word “Savior” you forget what it means.

Without a Savior, we would have no reason for hope. We would fear judgment and fear the future.

“Do not be afraid,” the angel told the shepherds, “for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy….” (Luke 2:10). God knows fear can neutralize joy. And He never created us for fear.

When Jesus was born, God’s people felt deep fears about their future under the tyrant, King Herod. But God’s message to them through the angel was, “Don’t be afraid. Your Savior, your Messiah, has come!”

And the Father's message to us today is STILL:

"Don't be afraid. Let go of all your fears.

Give them to Me. Let Me give you My joy instead ... real joy ... joy in Christ!"

This babe who was born became our dying Savior, and is our risen Lord. God is our “exceeding joy” (Psalm 43:4). In Christ, we can shout with joy, joining in chorus with the heavenly host: “Glory to God in the highest!” (Luke 2:14).

We were created for this!

We were made—as the Westminster Shorter Catechism says (answer to question #1)—“to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.”

The wonder of Christmas is a special opportunity to express that joy.

The Word of God can teach us how to glorify and enjoy Him more and better. But so can our Christmas hymns.

“Shepherds, why this Jubilee? Why your joyous strains prolong?

What the gladsome tidings be Which inspire your heavenly song?

Come to Bethlehem and see Him whose birth the angels sing;

Come adore on bended knee, Christ, the Lord, the newborn King.”

(“Angels, We Have Heard on High”)

The truth is, our Christmas celebrations are commemorations of joy that lead to adoration and worship.

What can you do during this holiday season to consider the word “Savior” and join the angel chorus for God’s good gift?

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Today, is a speaker and author, and the creator of three blogs: Heart Choices Today, LOL with God (with Pam Farrel), and Upgrade with Dawn. She is a contracted researcher/reviewer for Revive Our Heartsand a writer at Crosswalk.com. She and her husband Bob live in Southern California and have two grown, married sons, three granddaughters and a rascally maltipoo, Roscoe.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Geralt, Pixabay

I Can (Thanks to Jesus!)

In this Thanksgiving UPGRADE, Dawn Wilson invites us to be thankful for all the things we can do ... in Christ.

I was one of those bratty kids who stomped her feet and pouted with an obstinate, "I CAN'T!"

Mom would hear none of it. She promptly showed me how quickly I could, with a little "backside encouragement," do what she asked.

Old habits die hard. I still tend to say, "I can't," whenever the Lord asks me to do something.

God says, "Invite that woman to church."

"I can't. I'm afraid."

Or, "Teach that class."

"I can't. I'm not as smart as so-and-so."

Sometimes my "can't" really is a stubborn "won't," but most of the time it's because I think I'm not enough.

Not good enough, smart enough, young enough, connected enough. So many excuses.

You'd think I would have learned by now that God is my sufficiency in all things—especially those things HE calls me to do.

It's not that we are necessarily qualified to do anything on our own, but our competence and sufficiency come from the Lord—"It is God who makes us able to do all that we do" (2 Corinthians 3:4-5).

It's amazing how scripture can cut through all the "I can't-because-I'm-not-enough" excuses.

Here is another verse that is often quoted (and seldom fully embraced):

"I can do all things," it says in Phillipians 4:3, "through Christ who strengthens me."

All things.

Through Christ.

Believing that truth frees me to choose wisely, grow strong and be faithful to all God calls me to do.

I've learned that:

1. In Christ, I can DO it.

I can do the hard things. The things I've avoided, made excuses about or feared.

I can even do the thing the enemy keeps throwing up to me as "impossible," because "with God all things are possible" (Matthew 19:26).

2. In Christ, I can FACE it.

I can face my ugly past—and we all have one, from God's perspective. I can do this because God has forgiven me and made me righteous in Christ and right with God (1 John 1:9; Ephesians 1:7; 2 Corinthians 5:21).

I can face tough circumstances now because the Spirit of the Lord is with me (Psalm 118:6; 23:4; Matthew 28:20b).

I can face an uncertain future with hope and confidence too! (Psalm 23:6; 2 Corinthians 5:6, 8; Romans 8:28). 

3. In Christ, I can OVERCOME it.

I can take heart because Jesus, who has already overcome the world (John 16:33), can help me overcome my sins and addictions. God is faithful to help me, and when I am weak, He is strong (1 Corinthians 10:13; 2 Corinthians 12:10).

By faith, I can overcome, because Jesus in me is greater than the enemy Satan and his hoard of demons (1 John 4:4; 5:4). I can CHOOSE not to be overcome by evil, but instead CHOOSE to overcome evil with good (Romans 12:21).

I am an overcomer, because I am no longer a slave to sin. God's light has shined into my darkness and changed my heart (John 1:5; Romans 6:6, 6:18; Galatians 4:7).

Why did I make this "I Can" post my Thanksgiving praise today?

I praise the Lord for all the BLESSINGS that have come into my life because of this great truth: I CAN ... in Christ! 

When have you said, "I can't"? What is God telling you today?

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Today, is a speaker and author, and the creator of three blogs: Heart Choices Today, LOL with God (with Pam Farrel), and Upgrade with Dawn. She is a contracted researcher/reviewer for Revive Our Hearts and a writer at Crosswalk.com. She and her husband Bob live in Southern California and have two grown, married sons, three granddaughters and a rascally maltipoo, Roscoe.