Upgrade Your "DREAM" Goals

As I was thinking about the New Year, Kathy Carlton Willis inspired me with her “DREAM” acrostic. I want to share it with our Upgrade readers.

“Everyone has dreams God has planted in them,” Kathy said. “Whether they are big or small, they have vast importance in our lives. But to turn dreams into goals, we have to wake up the procrastinator.”

Kathy had me there! I am a part-time procrastinator. The apostle Paul spoke about goals (Philippians 3:13b-14) and the writer of Proverbs wrote about planning (Proverbs 21:5a), so I know God wants us to have goals.

Yet I had two goals that I was putting off planning for (procrastinating) until … when? It just seemed too overwhelming. But I’m glad I didn’t stop reading there.

Kathy continues …  

With just a little bit of planning, you can accomplish the goals God has for your life.

Set a realistic but challenging/inspiring goal. Make the goal big enough to challenge and excite you. Divide bigger goals into smaller steps so you aren’t overwhelmed.

Plan ahead. Once you’ve broken down your goal into pieces, keep a record of it on your computer or in a journal. Give yourself deadlines for each step. Otherwise, procrastination might get the best of you.

Brainstorm ideas. Wade through some silly ideas to mine the good nuggets.

Be passionate. Striving toward a goal without passion is like a fire which slowly runs out of fuel to burn. Get excited; this will only work if you love what you’re doing.

Revisit and evaluate your goals. Keep a record of your goals and make adjustments accordingly.

Consider new opportunities and options that come your way.

Ask God to show you what goals to set, and then get specific by asking Him to show you what you can do today to get one step, however small, closer to achieving your goals. Stay focused and believe in yourself even if others do not believe in you.

Set Your DREAM Goals:

D - Does it make a DIFFERENCE in your community? (Impact and Significance)

R - Can you REACH it? (Attainable and Realistic)

E - Does it ENERGIZE you? (Passion and Giftedness)

A - Can you ANALYZE it? (Track Results)

M - Does it fit your MISSION? (Purpose and Calling)

What are your DREAM Goals for this New Year? Which of Kathy’s tips might help you achieve them?

Kathy Carlton Willis shines for God, reflecting His light as a speaker at writer's conferences and women's retreats, and as an author - contributing to three books and writing hundreds of columns and articles online and in print publications. Her article today is an excerpt from Speaker to Speaker: The Essential Speaker’s Companion (Oaktara Publishing, to be released later in 2014). Kathy is also a publicist with Kathy Carlton Willis Communications. She and her husband/pastor,  Russ, live in Texas.

Image in Text: Courtesy of Grant Cochrane at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

On the Verge

December 31^st … we're on the verge of fresh new year.

This is the day some people begin thinking about New Year’s Resolutions. Others choose a word or phrase to motivate them in the next 365 days. I like to sit down with questions for reflection, to make sure I’m still on track and staying true to my priorities.

“Verge” means edge, rim or margin—the limit or point beyond which something begins or occurs. Being “on the verge” means almost doing or experiencing something; being very near or within striking distance; on the brink of something; or in transition to some new state or quality.

That perfectly describes my anticipation of the new year, and all of life, really. Being on the verge brings us to the point of change, perhaps even to a new adventure.

Being on the verge is an opportunity to upgrade our lives, to launch out into new projects, to decide how we will make a difference not only in our own lives, but in our homes, our churches and our communities.

I was reading in Isaiah and a scripture leaped from the pages of the Bible into my heart: 

“Do not remember the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it?” (Isaiah 43:18-19).

God says, don't remember the "former things.” It’s not just that God wants us to move past all our mistakes. God wants us to move past His marvelous works. He doesn’t want us to get stuck in the past. He doesn’t want us to put Him in a box, believing God must always work a certain way. He wants to do a new thing, perhaps more than we can even imagine (Ephesians 3:20).

That new thing may be a change in location, a change in circumstances, a change in direction or goals ... or even a change in us!

In this passage, God revealed Himself as Israel’s wonderful and only savior. The Almighty wanted Israel to understand how He was working on their behalf in their tough times—still leading, still challenging, still saving, still giving great grace.

Earlier in the chapter (verses 15-17), God revealed himself as “the Lord, your Holy One, the Creator of Israel, your King.” When we consider what may be ahead in our own lives, we must not forget who our God is—His character and the roles He plays in our lives.

He is our Creator, our source, the One who makes all things new. He transforms us. He is our King, our loving ruler, always working for our good as well as His glory. And He is our Savior, our deliverer, the One who gives victory.

No matter what’s ahead, He will be there. He is leading. He wants us to follow and surrender to His rule. You may not see what God is about to do, but you can believe He is already working. He declares in verse 19, “now it shall spring forth.” What he’s going to do is already beginning to sprout in you or through you. It’s just beneath the surface.

But the passage also says, “… shall you not know it?” To “know” in Hebrew is a total embrace of something … a total receptivity (like in husband-wife intimacy). God was saying, “Will you embrace the new thing I’m going to send into your life, no matter what it is?” Will you be open, available, ready to move with Him.

Why does God do “new things” in our lives? It’s not for our own glory; it’s to give a new platform for praise. “This people I have formed for Myself; they shall declare My praise” (v. 21).  God wants us to anticipate His new work, to trust Him in the process, and to praise Him when it begins and after it bears fruit.

To summarize:

• Remember what God has done for you in the past, but don’t get stuck there.
• Don’t limit God ... don't put Him in a box.
• Anticipate God’s “new thing” in your life—no matter your feelings, no matter your circumstances.
• Wonder over who God is—His character, roles and work. Do you know how "big" God is?
• Surrender to (embrace) what God will “sprout” in your life in the days ahead.
• Get ready to praise Him every step of the way!

You are on the verge of something exciting. Do you believe it? Are you ready to embrace the “new thing” God is bringing? If not, how can you prepare your heart today?

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Ministries, is the creator of three blogs: Heart Choices Today, LOL with God (with Pam Farrel), and Upgrade with Dawn. In these ministries and as President of the San Diego chapter of Network of Evangelical Women in MInistry (NEWIM San Diego), Dawn encourages, edifies and energizes women with  scripture so they can better enjoy life, bless others and honor God. Dawn and her husband Bob have two grown, married sons and three granddaughters.

See the 'Wows' of This Day

How many "Wow" moments have you seen or experienced already today?

Each of us chooses our perspective on life. We choose our overall worldview, certainly; but also, we choose how we will live based on our worldview.

Long ago, as a homeschool mom, I asked my boys to finish this statement: "Life is a _____." One son had two answers. "Life is a party," he said. "Life is an adventure!" This really didn't surprise me. Those answers reflected his fun, go-getter approach to practically everything.

My other son analyzed the question - so typical of him. He then responded, "Life is a struggle." I felt like I had a little budding philosopher on my hands. But at the time, this son was struggling with some life issues. It took some effort to get him to alter his approach and declare, "Life is a challenge." With his competitive nature, that was a more positive view.

I needed a viewpoint adjustment recently. I was growing weary with some daily concerns, bogged down in the mundane and having a hard time seeing any vision for change. Then a caring Sister-Girlfriend asked,

"Where did you see God's hand today?"

It was a simple question, but oh my, God's Spirit used her question to prick my conscience. I get so self-focused. It's hard to see God's hand when I'm only looking at my own. It's hard to understand God's heart, His thoughts, when I'm constantly turning inward.

I need more upward glances throughout my day. You likely do too.

That day, as I paused to think about the situations troubling me, I did indeed sense the presence of God; and that makes all the difference.

I saw that He was with me in a moment of temptation, giving me grace to do right. He was just as surely with me when I blew it - offering mercy and forgiveness. He was with me when physical pain made me grumpy, showing me how to suffer well (or at least, better). God was with me in moments of frustration, teaching me to believe He is in control; and in a situation I deemed hopeless, encouraging me to trust Him completely.

The more I considered my day, the more I realized I was never alone for one minute - and I saw so many "wows" of God's presence active in my life, the beauty of His provision and the constancy of His care.

We get so caught up in our stuff, don't we? Maybe this is why God calls us to daily, consistent communion with Him. I visited the chair in the photo (above) today in a time of quiet reflection. My Father God wants to "WOW" me with Himself.

How has God "wowed" you with His presence? Take a moment to thank Him.

Dawn Wilson is the founder of Heart Choices Ministries and creator of UpgradeWithDawn.com. Dawn's ministry encourages, edifies and energizes women with the truth of scripture so they can better enjoy life, bless others and honor God.

Seeking More 'Seeking God' Upgrades

There’s seeking God, and then there’s Seeking God! Maybe you know what I mean.

If you ask the average Christian, “Are you seeking God?” you’ll likely get a “yes.” Most of us think we’re seeking God when we attend church, read our Bibles, pray and pursue spiritual disciplines. And we likely are.

But then there are times when we get more desperate, more passionate, more focused. These are like Seeking God “Upgrades” in our lives!

• Maybe circumstances (pain, fear, confusion, a tough decision, a loss) drive us to seek Him.
• Perhaps we arrived at a special retreat or a solitary location—a blessed place without distractions—and we have the time and opportunity to seek Him more earnestly.
• Or maybe we suddenly, in the midst of self-seeking, feel the urgency to seek, find and know God more.

Many in this world say they are seeking God or some form of spirituality, but they are not seeking the God revealed in the Bible (Romans 3:11; John 17:3).

Once we have sought the God of the Bible to save us—and the writers at Girlfriends in God describe that seeking well—we will have many periods in our walk with God where we’re drawn back to Him in a closer, deeper way. God Himself calls us to seek Him (Psalm 27:8).

In the Old Testament, we see God calling to His people through the prophets and other godly people (see 1 Chronicles 22:19a; 28:9b; 2 Chronicles 15:2-4; Job 8:5; Isaiah 55:6-7; Amos 5:4-6a; Zephaniah 2:3). Over and over again, the Children of Israel heard these words: “Seek me and live.” … “Seek the Lord while he may be found.” … “If you seek Him, He will be found by you.” … “Set your mind and heart to seek the Lord your God.”

To seek the Lord means to seek His presence.

The Jews called it seeking God’s “face,” which makes sense—to be before God’s face would indicate being in His presence.

I used to wonder about God’s presence. Aren’t we always there?

He’s omnipresent, so yes, God is always present with us. He manifests His power and provision in our lives. He’s always near to love, guide and help us. He is faithful to His children “to the end of the age,” the Bible tells us (Matthew 28:20).

But in another sense, we’re exhorted to “seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!”(Psalm 105:4)

Do you know why we get that instruction? There are times when we drift away from the Lord. We are not conscious of His faithful presence. We forget how wonderful He is, the beauty of His grace, His purpose in sending Jesus, His work in our lives.

So God’s call to us is to seek Him continually. We set our mind and heart toward Him (1 Chronicles 22:19). In the New Testament, we’re told to fix our eyes on Jesus (Hebrews 12:2). Our whole focus, our attention and heart, are set on seeing and knowing God.  

Two of my favorite verses are Colossians 3:1-2: If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.

Our thoughts center around God Himself and His righteousness (Matthew 6:33), not just the splendors of heaven and glories of eternity.

Seeking God is a choice.

We have to recognize when we have wandered off or coasted spiritually and  been too busy for God; and we consciously choose to return and seek Him. He may seem hidden from us, so we seek Him as the treasure He is. We pay the price, take the effort. We "come away to a quiet place" and rest with Him (Mark 6:31a). We ask God to reveal Himself in the Word and manifest His glory in His creation and through the godly lives of others in the family of God.

Seeking Him implies there are hindrances and obstacles in the way. I’ve found that media, social media and the entertainment industry are three ways the enemy tries to dull my desire to seek God; but other things—even good, necessary things—can draw me away from seeking God when He calls. Certainly my own pride gets in the way, and I am not alone (Psalm 10:4). If I’m going to boast in anything, let it be that have sought God and know Him (Jeremiah 9:23-24).

Seeking God includes crying out to Him, even pleading for mercy (Isaiah 55:6; Job 8:5) as we draw near, recognizing His holiness.

God’s faithful promise to us is satisfaction for our seeking: “If you seek Him, He will be found by you” (1 Chronicles 28:9). Though we may find many other things in the seeking, the greatest reward will be God Himself—His sweet presence (Hebrews 11:6).

"Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice!" (Psalm 105:3)

Do you have special resources to help you seek God in a deeper way? Two resources from Revive Our Hearts  I recommend are The Quiet Place by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, and the Bible Study, Seeking Him, by Nancy Leigh DeMoss and Tim Grissom.

Dawn Wilson is the founder of Heart Choices Ministries and creator of UpgradeWithDawn.com and also blogs at LOLwithGod.com. Dawn's ministry encourages, edifies and energizes women with the truth of scripture so they can better enjoy life, bless others and honor God. She lives in San Diego with her husband Bob and a rascally maltipoo named Roscoe.

My 5 'Rs' for a Long Marriage

A sweet young girl approached me at the book table after I spoke at a women’s event. “The woman who introduced you said you’ve been married almost 40 years,” she said. “What’s your secret?”

I’ve been asked that a lot lately, and I’ve been hesitant to answer (maybe because I have so many of my friends’ great marriage books in my library). I thought, “What more can I say?”

But I'm beginning to realize how few marriages last for four decades or more, so I decided I’ll share my own UPGRADE Your Marriage encouragement.

I think a good long marriage boils down to five "Rs."

(1) Remembrance

My husband and I remember our vows. There were no “if” statements on our wedding day, no back door escape clauses. We made commitments to each other until death. Those vows meant something. They still do.

(2) Responsibility

We took our Ephesians 5 responsibilities seriously. It started with verse 2 to “walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us…,” and continued through the verses about sexual purity and other godly behaviors as “children of light”—we learned how to walk in wisdom and submit to one another in love  (vv. 3-21).

Out of that understanding and growth, God gave us the strength and insight to embrace our “marriage responsibilities” (vv. 22-33). My husband strives to love me as Christ loved the church, and I seek to submit to him as to the Lord. Love and humility are to reign, not selfishness.

(3) Respect

One of my guiding principles is Ephesians 5:33: “let the wife see that she respects her husband.” Respect is a man’s core emotional need. If I don’t fill up his “respect cup,” who will? That is how he feels loved. So I let that respect begin at home, and I smile at him and praise him in public – letting the world know I’m “proud of my man.”

(4) Response

As his wife, I also want to be a faithful responder. I want to respond to his masculinity with biblical femininity and to his authority in our marriage. I respond to his advice and counsel, and support his goals and dreams.

I’m careful to be modest in public, but drop that modesty in private, responding to his need for physical intimacy. I respond to his human frailties with understanding, grace and forgiveness; and I give him a safe place to share his thoughts. I respond with gratitude and contentment for his provision (while recognizing that God is my ultimate Provider).

(5) Renewal – No marriage is easy. We need constant renewal—God’s wisdom, power and enabling. God’s Spirit helps us check our hearts and motives so we won’t put each other on pedestals or trample each other’s hearts. The closer each of us gets to God, the closer we are drawn to each other, so we try to seek Him and His plans first.

My friends who write marriage books offer many practical tips that complement each of these points, but when I keep these 5 Rs in mind, the rest seems to take care of itself.

Every marriage can improve. Which of these “R” words would UPGRADE Your Marriage today?

Dawn Wilson is the founder of Heart Choices Ministries and creator of UpgradeWithDawn.com and also blogs at LOLwithGod.com. Dawn's ministry encourages, edifies and energizes women with the truth of scripture so they can better enjoy life, bless others and honor God. She lives in San Diego with her husband Bob and a rascally maltipoo named Roscoe.