Persevering the Staircase of Suffering

Sherri Cullison is a phenomenal woman who has found God to be "enough" in her struggles. In this Perseverance UPGRADE, she shares three ways to cultivate perseverance in times of suffering.

“I am so excited you’re giving me your exercise bike,” Sherri exclaimed. "My uncle stood stunned, eyes wide and straight-faced."

I (Dawn) have to tell you, I met Sherri some years ago, after she suffered a terrible loss. Yet she was engaging and eager to see how God might use her in spite of her pain. I have been blessed to see her perseverance.

In this article, she writes about two different kinds of suffering she's experienced, and how perseverance helped her deal with both.

Sherri continues . . .

Truthfully, I really was excited about the exercise bike. For months, I wanted to lose weight to feel stronger and healthier, but I couldn’t exercise standing due to an old injury.

I had the desire to reduce fat and build muscle, but I felt chained to the recliner, hopeless of ever becoming fit. But now, with a little work, I could pedal myself away on a new journey of fitness.

I knew I had to start slow and easy, so I set a goal of pedaling for five minutes.

Quickly, my lungs labored, and my leg muscles burned.

My will grew weak, and I wanted to give up.

Then I pushed myself a little harder and finished my first five minutes. Hurray.

Now I’m a world-class athlete. Not likely. But what brings success to my goal? Persevering on this uncomfortable contraption for just a few minutes every day.

Several years ago, I thought perseverance wasn’t an option.

After losing my youngest daughter Sarah, I trudged through my grief-walk each day, dreading the next.

• My body operated as if fifty-pound weights were anchored to my ankles.
• My mind floated in a fog and functioned unreliably.
• Tears came easy and the hands of anxiety choked my breath away.
• There were days I wasn’t sure I would even make it to the next.

Sometimes we feel we’ll never recover from life’s struggles, but how we choose to handle our circumstances is vital to surviving life-altering changes.

The suffering we often experience is incomprehensible, yet God’s Word encourages us:

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope (Romans 5:1-4 NIV).

Certainly, I didn’t feel like “glory-ing” in my suffering when I lost my daughter, but God promised that in my suffering I would find perseverance.

And then character.

And finally, hope.

With hope, I knew I could get through this nightmare.

How do we grasp this hope that God promises? Three helpful answers are found in Hebrews 12.

1. Choose to Run the Race with Endurance.

Hebrews 12:1 (NLT)

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily hinders our progress. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us.

Sometimes that means letting go of sin’s grip.

When we’re sinning, we don’t want to run with God. We would rather walk on our own.

Often, we need to downsize our responsibilities. It’s okay to say no, and it’s okay to remove those heavy things in our lives that slow us down.

Allow yourself the grace to simplify your life.

2. Choose to Consistently Fix Our Eyes on Jesus.

Hebrews 12:2, 3 (NLT)

We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from start to finish. He was willing to die a shameful death on the cross because of the joy he knew would be his afterward.

Think about all he endured when sinful people did such terrible things to him, so that you don’t become weary and give up.

Jesus endured merciless beatings, humiliation, and imminent death. However, we fix our eyes on our current situation and honestly, not enough on Jesus and what He endured.

Pursuing time alone with Him every day will bring light to our dark situation. Pray simple prayers and allow him to carry your heavy load.

3. Choose to Persevere in Living a Life that Others Follow.

Hebrews 12:12 (NLT)

So, take a new grip with your tired hands and stand firm on your shaky legs. Mark out a straight path for your feet. Then those who follow you, though they are weak and lame, will not stumble and fall but will become strong.

Paul wasn’t kidding when he said our hands would be tired and our legs shaky.

Some steps of life begin at the bottom of a long, dark staircase where we hesitate to even take the first step. But God tells us to mark out a straight path. Map your thoughts and actions, and don’t give up.

Push to persevere. Then watch others follow and become strong.

You’ve just built character here. And that, my friend, leads to hope.

What steps will you take this week to pursue your goals and meet glory in your suffering?

Sherri J. Cullison, author and speaker, knows the pain and devastation life brings. Whether your hope is treading or sinking, Sherri’s heart for hope reveals how we can manage our everyday struggles to claim joy and love life.  In her recent book, SOS: A Mother’s Story of Survival, Rescue, and Hope in the Darkness of Teen Suicide, Sherri shares the heartbreaking loss of her daughter and the evidence of God’s healing, forgiveness, and restoration. Sherri and her husband live in Arizona and have two children, seven grandchildren, five pianos, and one RZR. Discover more about Sherri and her story at www.sherrijcullison.com

When Life Has You Puzzled

Kolleen Lucariello's mind is a wonderful thing. Creative and inspiring, she approaches life with a unique spin on God's hand in our lives. In this Wisdom UPGRADE, she offers sound biblical truth for times when life has us puzzled.

"My granddaughter held the box in her hands and asked, 'What do you say, Mimi? Want to do this puzzle with me?' Hesitation swelled within," Kolleen says, "when I saw which puzzle she held."

I (Dawn) love everything "puzzles," so Kolleen's title immediately drew me in. But her application stuck with me long after I read this post. I've been puzzled about something in my life, and I needed to hear her words.

Kolleen continues . . .

The puzzle contained 1,000 pieces and our time together was almost over; it would be impossible to complete before she left.

My face gave away my thoughts so she followed up with a “Puh-leeeeease?”

“Oh, alright. Let’s give it a try.”

I knew they’d be leaving soon and intended to throw it all back into the box once they walked out the door. However . . .

To my surprise, more family members decided to join in the puzzle fun. Soon, the outer edge was well on its way to completion. Then, with multiple pieces in place we heard, “Okay, kids; it’s time to go.”

After a short discussion on how to proceed, Papa and Mimi decided we’d come too far to take it all apart and throw it back into the box. So, we pressed on. 

As we worked toward our goal to complete the puzzle, there were moments when the similarities between life and a puzzle became clearer to me than the piece I was looking for.

Life certainly can be puzzling sometimes, can’t it? 

I lost count of how many times I’d scan and search for one particular piece for forever, only to have my puzzle partner stand over my shoulder, pick up the piece which was laying right in front of me, slide it in perfectly, chuckle and say, “You mean this one?”

And just like that the missing piece I’d spent an hour looking for was found. 

It’s puzzling how quickly fresh eyes can pick out what has been staring at you but remained unseen.

Why couldn’t I see that?

We may wonder when another brings light to our blind spots. At the moment, it might also be a tad bit frustrating. But it’s valuable if progress is to be made. 

Having my blind spots exposed is humbling. I prefer to believe I don’t have any, but I live knowing I do.

I’ve come to appreciate and value the way God uses others to help me see what I either can’t or, quite honestly, don’t want to. 

As we pushed forward with our puzzle, I noticed how tempting it became to place a wrong-but-close piece into what seemed-like-it-should-go-there.

The puzzle was on our kitchen table for weeks.

We soon had a strong desire to git-r-done. This desire provoked a “close enough” attitude—numerous times. But, one misplaced piece led to several more and caused moments of backtracking when one would say, “That’s not right.” Sigh. 

Things began to move along nicely after we began asking, “Do you think this piece goes here?” 

Puzzle pieces were designed to fit where they were designed to fit. It doesn’t matter how hard you try, you can’t force the wrong piece in where it wasn’t intended to go.

Mistakes happen, but the greater tragedy is our refusal to admit them or seek advice in the hopes of limiting them.

A countless number of people are backtracking through their life story to find healing from wounds inflicted through mistakes and missteps. When we don’t know how to proceed, wisdom asks, “Do you think this piece goes here?” 

Perhaps God would use our journey through Puzzle Park to bring an upgrade in a life that’s been puzzled by circumstance.

If that’s you, I’d like to offer you these two nuggets. 

1. Walk in Wisdom

“The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice” or “Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered” (Proverbs 12:15, 28 ESV).

Whether it is in our parenting, marriage, career, life-choices, or relationships: God used Solomon’s words to reveal the important role we play in the lives of others—to help uncover blind spots.

Only a fool would want to live blind and frustrated by what others can see.

2. Don't Give Up.

"And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9 ESV). 

When you’ve hit a snag and want to cater to the “close enough” attitude, please remember there is beauty in completing the work God set before you. Press on!

The puzzle we almost gave up on due to its difficulty is now framed for full display during the Christmas season.

God holds the pieces to our life puzzle.

• He knows the entirety of the plan He has for us.
• He’s aware when we’re stuck behind blind spots and has planned our way to clarity. We are wise to listen.
• He also knows when weariness is hindering our attitude to give our best effort. We are wise to ask for help.

So, when life has you puzzled, do you allow wisdom to lead the way?

Kolleen Lucariello, #TheABCGirl, is the author of #beYOU: Change Your Identity One Letter at a Time and is the Co-Director of Activ8Her, Inc. She is passionate to every woman realize her identity in Christ and live accordingly. Kolleen and her hubby, Pat, make their home in Central New York. She’s the mom of three grown children and Mimi to six incredible grands. For more information about Kolleen, visit www.speakkolleen.com

The Secret to Doing Hard Things

Kathy Carlton Willis is amazing. I've watched her go through a series of tough circumstances over the last few years, and she always manages to choose biblical responses as she teaches others how to deal with struggles as "God's Grin Gal." In this Biblical Thinking UPGRADE, she shares her secret for doing hard things.

“I’m usually self-sufficient but lately I’ve realized more than ever that I’m not Wonder Woman,” Kathy says. “The demands of life not only highlight my weaknesses, but spotlight God’s strength.

Now I (Dawn) just shared how amazing Kathy is, but if you read her opening statement, you'll realize how humble she is before the Lord, always trusting His sovereign purposes. 

Kathy continues . . .

Everyone’s been talking about what a hard year 2020 has been. My personal worst day of an already bad year happened the day before Hurricane Delta hit our area.

My family sold our forever home to move to an area where my husband’s job landed him, and we dealt with many unknowns at once—more like didn’t deal with them.

The day finally came to load the last POD with belongings and hit the road.

Sometimes you gain life lessons through the worst experiences!

Here’s what I learned.

Don’t believe what they say a POD storage unit holds. 

We packed to the ceiling, but still had items that wouldn’t fit. So we had to leave behind multiple pieces of furniture. This day was a day of many mini goodbyes.

Packing and loading a POD with your mate will show you how well you work together and love each other. 

Russ and I passed that test!

I also learned I’m still strong physically and on the inside. Grateful for that strength to come through when I needed it.

One time when we flipped a heavy desk upside down to stack it on top of the washer and dryer, I turned to Russ and said, “We did this. We did this. We did this!

Sometimes you have to celebrate the immediate accomplishment before the entire goal is even completed.

Moving the day before a hurricane hits is not wise. 

Loading a POD while it’s lightly raining wasn’t great. But driving in a three-car caravan through almost zero-visibility on highways packed with merciless aggressive drivers evacuating the area is a nightmare.

My husband drove lead and went faster than we were comfortable following. He made a couple of turns not in the plans.

Mom drove in the middle and had a hard time seeing or keeping up with Russ. I was the caboose and my main job was to keep an eye on Mom and go where she went, even when she lost the lead car.

This meant pulling over three times for regrouping and calling Russ to reconnect. The phone map app in remote locations wasn’t reliable.

We truly got to the destination as a grace of God—I’m sure of it.

God can be trusted. 

When we were just two minutes down the road, physically exhausted from loading the POD, emotionally exhausted from saying goodbye to my forever home, and mentally exhausted from dealing with multiple challenges in addition to the weather, I whined to God.

I can’t do this.

God said, “Can you trust Me?”

Yes, Lord.

He said, “Don’t focus on what you can’t do, focus on trusting Me, and I’ll take care of the rest. I’ll get you there.”

Okay Lord.

For the 2.5 hour trip, I prayed . . . and prayed. 

You can do hard things. 

After enduring the above issues and getting to the destination, we had three vehicles to unload in the pouring down rain, making about twenty trips into our temporary dwelling place.

I was perfectly willing to get soaking wet and exert more physical energy and lifting compared to driving in those awful conditions.

Perspective can help you deal with yucky stuff by remembering something far worse.

Storms are called storms for a reason. 

The physical storm of Hurricane Delta was horrendous. Way worse than predicted. And going through it in a strange place was difficult.

We had three worn out frustrated people who craved space, all situated in tight quarters. Not ideal.

But we were safe. Safe in the storm.

 How to Do Hard Things

1. Trust God.

Without trusting Him, we’re actually trusting in ourselves. And sadly, we don’t have what it takes apart from God to get it done.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take (Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT).

2. Do the first thing.

Don’t try to tackle it all. Just do the step immediately in front of you. God will show you what it is.

The Lord is my strength and shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving (Psalm 28:7 NLT).

3. Keep going when it’s hard.

It might not get easier until it is OVER.

“The Lord says, ‘I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name’ (Psalm 91:14 NLT).

4. Celebrate when to-do becomes ta-done.

In our eagerness to be productive, we often forget this step before moving on to the next thing.

This is the day the Lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it (Psalm 118:24 NLT).

Your choices in hard times can spotlight the Lord’s strength and faithfulness.

What hard thing does God want you to do this week?

Kathy Carlton Willis is God’s Grin Gal. She writes and speaks with a balance of funny and faith—whimsy and wisdom. Over a thousand of Kathy’s articles have been published and she has several books in her Grin Gal brand. Look for 7 Trials Every Woman Faces, coming soon. Kathy is active as a book industry pro, and her coaching group, WordGirls, propels women toward their writing goals. She graduated with honors from Bible College and has served 30+ years in full-time ministry. Check out her Grin & Grow Break video devotions on social media. www.kathycarltonwillis.com

Graphic of PODS Storage Unit at Mobile Attic.

Graphic adapted of Hurricane Delta, courtesy of Wikipedia.

Hold On! Help Is on the Way!

Sally Ferguson is a practical encourager. She writes to help people deal with everyday struggles from an eternal perspective. In this Perseverance UPGRADE, she writes about the importance of faith energizing us to help us deal with the tough times—and not give up.

"The urge to quit hits every cycle of life," Sally says. "Parents experience it. Employees go through it. And entrepreneurs struggle with it.

"What gives a person staying power?"

I (Dawn) know a little about "staying power." I never liked the circumstances that built the character trait of perseverance into my life, but now I can thank God for those tough times.

Sally continues . . .

In the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus prayed for a different plan. If Jesus wanted an out, then who am I to think I’m any different?

My Glossary says perseverance is to “persist in exercising faith in Christ.”

When I look in the Hebrews Hall of Fame — often called the "Hall of Faith"— I find Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, Samuel and others who persisted.

• They overcame torture, jeers, and flogging. (I’m a wimp when it comes to pain.)
• Stones were thrown at them. (Ouch!)
• They felt the teeth of saws. (Razor sharp!)
• And they wandered without homes. (I like my security!)

But Hebrews 11:34 says, their “weakness was turned to strength.”

At first, I’m prone to say, "What? How can weakness be strength?” Then, I consider an outing we had last weekend.

We made arrangements for family to stay with Dad, while hubby and I went away for two nights to Erie, Pennsylvania. A short jaunt away from our home, it was the perfect getaway. We packed our swimsuits and bicycles and headed for Presque Isle State Park.

I don’t get on my bicycle very often, so you can imagine the muscles groaning against the new motion. I felt wobbly-weak. But, muscle memory returned and three days of bike riding turned into new confidence and pleasure. My weakness turned to strength.

This strength also happens when our faith-muscle is exercised. We push against atrophy and receive renewed determination to persevere.

James refers to this in his letter, chapter 1, verse 3: “the testing of your faith develops perseverance.” I’m all about persevering, but not so keen about the testing.

Let’s look at another example.

Hebrews 12:1 says to run with perseverance, and that takes me back to my days in high school track.

I ran the mile. Actually, I dragged myself through a mile of torture. (Why does anyone sign up for track, anyway?) I was always in last place, but a fellow runner told me he was inspired, because I never gave up.  That one piece of encouragement has carried me through miles of disappointments, discouragement and defeat over the years.

Never give up!

What kept me going in track?

• Teamwork
• Cheering from the sidelines
• Accountability

What keeps me going in life?

• Teamwork — When you partner with others, it lightens the load. (Philippians 4:2-3)
• Cheering from the sidelines — Everyone needs a cheerleader! (Acts 15:32)
• Accountability — Others are watching. (Galatians 6:1-5)

How about another example of perseverance?

Have you ever spent the day in the kitchen and felt like wilting? Maybe canning beans, zucchini or peaches on a hot summer day, making multiple pies for a holiday feast, or kneading dough to rise?

Every time I make turkey frame soup, I mentally declare it will be my last.

The bones boil in water to release meat and flavor. Then, using forks to separate meat from bones, I go through each piece on a cookie tray. It’s a tedious process that leaves my bones groaning!

But what keeps a cook going when the feet want relief? The tasty reward of success!

I remember I am feeding my hungry family with pleasing flavors and hardy meals. I anticipate the oohs and aahs of contentment, and feel the satisfaction of a job well done.

That’s what we can look forward to, when our Father calls us home. (Hebrews 10:35-39)

Let’s go back to our friends in the Hebrews Hall of Fame. What kept them strong?

We can find their secret in 11:1-2. They exercised their faith muscles and then trusted God to supply the rest.

God’s power enables us to follow Him (2 Peter 1:3-11), and that is what I count on when I’m out of breath and ready to quit. He equips me with His power.

Wow—I have a hard time wrapping my brain around that one, but I cling to it anyway. And that is where my weakness becomes strength. I acknowledge my inability to measure up, press on, or comprehend, and God replies, “My strength is perfected in your weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).

How about you? Do feel like giving up? Have you had enough of interrupted plans and rearranged schedules?

Bring your cares to the Lord and let Him carry you. He will give you strength when you focus your eyes on Him and the eternal glory yet to be seen!

How will you stay focused on Jesus?

Sally Ferguson is a caregiver for her dad and her grands. She lives in western New York with her hubby of 33 years. She is the author of What Will I Be When I Grow Up? and How to Plan a Women's Retreat. Look for her words at EzineArticles, AlmostAnAuthor, Upgrade with Dawn, Amazon and sallyferguson.net.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Sira Anamwong at FreeDigital.com.

What Makes Bite-sized Upgrades Work?

I have written about UPGRADING our lives since 2013, and in that process, the Lord has shown me how to cooperate with Him to upgrade my own life.

In that process I've also learned an important lesson:  

Personal upgrades can be overwhelming.

It's true no matter what we're tackling:

• weight loss,
• toning our bodies,
• creating a more joyful or contented spirit,
• moving forward without fear toward a personal goal or dream,
• learning to be a better parent or grandparent,
• becoming a prayer warrior,
• making decisions that lead toward financial freedom,
• and a host of other upgrade choices!

In a very practical way, personal UPGRADES begin with a choice toward a goal, and then we break down that goal into small (bite-sized) action steps.

Case in point: I wrote on Facebook recently that helping some loved ones pack and move motivated me to clean out my home of my own overflow of "stuff."

I decided:

1. I no longer use or want many things that still are cluttering my shelves, cabinets and garage—why am I keeping them?
2. I want to move forward into new adventures and new ministries, and don't want to be "encumbered" by unnecessary and distracting clutter.
3. I do not want to leave so much "stuff" to my children to dispose of—so this became a "legacy issue" for me.

But considering this UPGRADE goal, I soon became overwhelmed with the thought of the "how" of making that change.

But then that old adage—"How do you eat an elephant?"—came to mind.

We "eat an elephant" one bite at a time!

One bite.

So what was my "one bite" for clearing out the clutter? I decided I could manage one box per week to Amvets or some other charity. That would equal 52 boxes of "clutter" and unused-but-useful items gone from my home in one year!

I am tackling weight loss the same way. Losing all the weight I need to lose is overwhelming, but I can choose bite-sized goals for each day.

I want to write a book this year. It feels daunting. But the Lord is giving me some bite-sized goals, and my "elephant" doesn't seem so huge.

Now this is not a new insight. The "eat an elephant" example has been around for a long time.

But what makes it powerful is when we take action.

Author Pam Farrel recently wrote about the many action steps the Proverbs 31 woman took that changed her life, enabled her to bless others, and earned her well-deserved praise.

Pam even wrote an action planner to encourage wise action steps.

We have to take that one bite... and another... and another.

The key to bite-sized actions making a difference is PERSEVERANCE!

We need to stick to it—or as Pam Farrel says—"Get It Done, Girl!"

• We can't make a resolution and forget it the next week.
• We can't make a decision and then back away.
• We can't set a goal and then suddenly think it doesn't matter.

Perseverance is a steady pursuit of a goal or a repeated action despite difficulty or delay in achieving success.

It includes tenacity, determination, resolve, purposefulness, courage, endurance and staying power.

With that in mind, I will persevere in cleaning out my home, losing weight, and writing a book in 2019.

The Bible encourages in this regard. It speaks much about practical perseverance in the Christian life.

One of the scriptures currently motivating my life is to be a "doer" of the Word and not a "hearers"  only (James 1:22-24).

A successful life doesn't grow out of hearing and nodding in agreement or even expressing good intentions.

To be a success, we must take action and persevere.

Even when it's hard.

Even when it takes courage.

The more we persevere in our walk with God, the more God teaches and blesses us, and the Holy Spirit empowers us to continue to persevere! Christians should desire to persevere and cooperate with the Spirit as He works to change our hearts and make us more like Jesus!

Ask yourself this question:

"What is God trying to accomplish in my life, and how can I cooperate with Him in complete surrender and obedience?

Then ask,

"How can I make little decisions every day—bite-sized upgrades—to persevere in that cooperation?"

It is perseverance in the right direction and with effective actions that make our intended upgrades work!

What upgrades do you want to make this year? What bite-sized choice can you make today ... and tomorrow ... and all year long?

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Today, is a speaker and author, and the creator the blog, Upgrade with Dawn. She is a contracted researcher/reviewer for Revive Our Hearts  and a writer at Crosswalk.com. She and her husband Bob live in Southern California and have two grown, married sons, three granddaughters and a rascally maltipoo, Roscoe.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Geralt at Pixabay.